Friday, September 5, 2014

ANTM: A Deluge of Everything

Last week on ANTM: It was the second half of the casting episode! The remaining 22 contestants had to quickly change and board a subway to take pictures…four times. Most got left behind, leaving only Matthew and Danny standing. Matthew wins the challenge. Romeo continues to dislike Danny and Mirjana jumps on board that wagon. On a beach, Kelly introduces them to their new creative director—Yu Tsai. After some solo pictures in order to get advice from Yu Tsai, the models posed for a group shot on the beach. Tyra, Kelly, Yu and Ms. J went through the pictures and made their final picks. Tyra revealed the finalists and sent the rejects—including Danny—home. Fourteen contestants remain, who will be eliminated tonight? Find out!

Wanna be on top?

Tyra reminds the finalists they will be walking in a runway show wearing nothing but silly string. And she tells them it is a challenge so they better work it. She dismisses them to hair and make up.

Chantelle and Shei talk about how they can’t believe they are there. The makeup artist asks if Chantelle is confident in her walk. She is. Meanwhile, Romeo talks about being a witch and casting a spell to send Danny home. He wants to see Ivy go home next. For her part, Ivy tells the makeup artist that she doesn’t usually wear makeup and then tells us how she was an awkward child. She thinks Mirjana is loud and that Romeo is causing drama. Meanwhile, Matthew continues to flirt with Mirjana, who likes it. But she has a boyfriend! But their relationship isn’t doing so well because he doesn’t support her.

Ms. J comes in with Alexis Borges from Next, who is there to scout out who will potentially be their new client. He tells them that he is looking for strength and confidence when they are out on the runway. Lenox is a bit unnerved about the clothing choice.

But first, Ms. J does what he does best: critiques their walks! He makes fun of Matthew’s walk and calls Raelia’s “too sexy.” Meanwhile, most of the guys are attracted to Kari. Keith talks about growing up with a single parents in the projects as Ms. J gives him some posture advice. He then sends them to get silly-stringed up. And wasn’t it nice to have someone work on their walks again? I missed that the pass few cycles.

Pixels everywhere! Silly string gets sprayed as Adam says he looks the best naked out of all the guys. Glad to see he’s modest! (Please note the sarcasm). But Kari has eyes for Keith. Will worries about losing his silly string on the runway and talks about how much competition there is among the guys. He was also very shy in school and wouldn’t take his shirt off then, so he’s nervous now as they line up to begin the show.

COMMERCIALS!

Keith opens the show and is surprised when the crowd starts spraying him with more silly string. Ms. J praises him and this week is Alexis’ turn to comment about how much Keith looks like Tyson Beckford. Will doesn’t lose his silly string but he does worry about not being masculine enough. We zoom past a few people till we get to Adam, who decides to go balls to the walls and just have fun. Kari doesn’t know what he’s doing as she watches backstage. Alexis called it a joke and that he was missing a keg. Ms. J also adds “my foot up his ass.” We zoom past a few people, including Kari who admits to not being able to see from all the silly string.

Next solo is Chantelle. Alexis likes her. Ivy also gets a solo. She tries to be confident but Alexis is not impressed. Alexis worries about Romeo’s tattoos. Final walks and then…

Time for the judges’ opinions! Alexis tells Adam to take fashion a little bit more seriously. He likes Ivy’s face but felt she was too 80s and in a bad way. He hopes she sticks around though and thinks makeovers will be good to her. He singles out Keith and Chantelle as the best ones. So who wins the challenge? Find out after…

COMMERCIALS!

And the winner is Keith! He gets the key to the Tyra Suite! That’s still a thing! He credits Ms. J for helping him win. Ms. J tells Keith he can invite a friend. He looks like he’s thinking but Denzel says that everyone knows he’s going to pick Kari because everyone would pick Kari. In the end, Keith picks Kari. Kari says she won’t let anything crazy happen but then backtracks to say she’ll see what happens. Ms. J tells them to go move into their new house.

LA! The model mobile takes them to their new house. Is it just me, or are they starting to all look the same? Or are they using the same house? The house has a storm theme and in her confessional, you can tell Shei’s already had her makeover since she’s covering her hair. Chantelle praises the view they have. Matthew remembers to compliment Tyra. He’ll go far.

Keith and Kari move into the Tyra Suite. Everyone checks it out, including the pictures of baby!Tyra in the room.

They pull themselves away from the Tyra Suite and exploring their house to notice the Challenge Scores have been posted. Romeo notes that Ivy is on the bottom. And probably only because it’s also alphabetical, so Adam comes first. But Ivy is bummed. Adam decides it’s best to break out the beer pong instead of focusing on his low score. He brags about how much he can drink. Is it wrong that I’m predicting a scene where he gets rushed to the hospital with alcohol poisoning followed by a lecture from Tyra? With scowling Kelly standing behind her?

Meanwhile, Will notes everyone is flirting with each other and he’s hoping that there’s another gay man in the house. Isn’t Romeo bisexual? No, wait, scratch that. I don’t want Romeo anywhere near Will.
Kari gets to see Keith naked. We get to see him and pixels. They goof around before going to sleep. Keith says he didn’t want to come on to her and scare her…then we see him saying “Spoon me.” Kari says she won’t mess around but she will cuddle. And they spoon.

Elsewhere, Matthew and Mirjana share a bed as the music turns to “generic romance movie soundtrack.” In the confessional, Mirjana says they haven’t kissed but thinks their relationship can go deeper. The next morning, she calls her best friend. And it turns out her boyfriend is more supportive than she thought—he’s been promoting her on social media! Are they legally obligated to use such a generic, sweeping term instead of something specific? Anyway, she starts to feel bad about flirting and cuddling with Matthew. But when she talks to the others, she says her boyfriend’s on Twitter promoting her. Matthew’s brain stops working at the word “boyfriend.” You can see the moment his heart breaks. Mirjana thinks he’s jealous.

We get a new entry into the “This is not America’s Next Top (blank)” annals! Mirjana says this is not “Find America’s Next Top Lover.”

COMMERCIALS!

TYRA MAIL! “H2T? H2OMG!” Tyra looks a little drunk in that selfie, doesn’t she? Anyway, Will says he had a low score in the challenge and has to bring it at the photoshoot.

Tyra greets the models and reintroduces them to Yu Tsai. And I have to apologize. I believe in my last recap, I said Yu Tsai was the first creative director since Mr. Jay. Somehow I had blocked Johnny Wujek completely out. How could I forget that sassy, hat-wearing man? Anyway, Tyra reveals they’re all doing the ALS ice bucket challenge! Just kidding. But they will be drenched with water. Tyra makes the guys show off their abs. And says she calls that the “boom boom boom.” For the girls, it’s the “boom boom wow.” But wait! There’s more! We will get to see them film the main titles! She wants sexy but not sleazy. And Tyra will be there filming as well.

The models go to hair and make up as the crew prepares for the shoot. Tyra talks to  director Tony Croll about what is going to happen and notes what she has to instruct the models about. They come in to see Tyra’s shoot. Everyone admires Tyra and she tells them to practice their “whip” in the mirror because of the slow motion that will be used. Ivy is afraid she won’t be able to live up to Tyra’s standards.

Raelia goes first and Yu Tsai introduces her to the photographer, Erik Asla. He tells her to incorporate the water. She has a moment of panic and you hear Tyra telling her to recover, which she does. Kari says it was difficult with the water but she seems to nail it. Yu Tsai instructs Denzel to take his shirt off. Thank you, Yu Tsai. Meanwhile, Adam does some pushups before his shoot and brags about his physique. Yu Tsai calls him Tarzan and Mirjana thinks he’s not in the competition for the right reasons.

Hair tries to work with Chantelle to make sure her hair looks fabulous when it gets wet. But she still struggles. Erik tells Keith to soften it up without losing his masculinity. Meanwhile, Will is still worried about his body. As the water pours, he just stands there. Move, Will! Tu Tsai says he looks like a hunchback as he continues to struggle on set. Don’t let me down, Will! I like you! Yu Tsai yells at Will as we go to…

COMMERCIALS!

LA! Erik is surprised to learn Will is 6’6, saying he’s making himself look 5’2. Yu Tsai says it doesn’t look good and Tyra is frowning as she looks on the monitor. Tyra warn Shei not to be hoochie and Yu Tsai tells her not to pop her hip. Ben looks awkward and covers his “boom boom boom” the entire time. Yu Tsai praises Lenox and Tyra loves her whip. Yu Tsai tells Matthew he looks like a model and moves like a model but it’s not coming across. Matthew confesses that Mirjana is a distraction. Mirjana, meanwhile, is told to close her mouth. Denzel says that she’s still a young girl but very beautiful.

Backstage, Romeo tells Ivy that he doesn’t see the guys as competition because he feels he has more in common with the girls. And that she’s his biggest threat. He flat out tells her he wants her gone and she laughs it off. Ivy says you can’t let your guard down in this competition. On set, Yu Tsai tells Romeo to go feminine and loves everything he does. Ivy is next and Yu Tsai says she’s overthinking it. He asks her what happened at the challenge and she said it didn’t go well and she didn’t know what she did wrong. Yu Tsai says that’s troubling. Wasn’t it just her look? That Alexis thought she looked too 80s and that a makeover would go a long way? Anyway, Erik tells her not to be too shy. She knows she didn’t do well.

Skull Mail! You know the drill—tomorrow, someone walks the plank. I mean, gets eliminated. Ivy says it would be embarrassing to be the first one cut. Will, meanwhile, declares he’s not going home.

Surprise, surprise—Adam wants to party! Mirjana asks him to stop drinking but he insists he can handle it. There’s an intervention in the future of this cycle, isn’t there? She challenges his insistence that he can handle it so he challenges her to an athletic competition. He brags about getting a 1510 on his SAT so she can’t get into his head. She says it doesn’t matter because he’s going home. Matthew lays into Mirjana, saying their opinions don’t matter and she shouldn’t tell people they are going home. And now Mirjana doesn’t like him. Well, that was fast. Matthew storms out as we go to…

COMMERCIALS!

PANEL! Tyra welcomes them to judging. There are judges: Kelly and Ms. J. Ms. J is doing the hair thing again, except this time he’s styling his hair to reflect different eras. They have to stay in the competition to see them all! There are prizes. As usual, I will list them all when I recap the finale. Time for judging! Adam goes first and Kelly says it scares her. She says it looks like the person taking care of her kayak on her Hawaiian vacation and it looks like he wants to have group sex. Ms. J calls him “knucklehead nuts.” But Tyra disagrees, saying he has a crazy energy and it translated well. Scores (Ms J, Tyra, Kelly): 6, 9, 7.

Denzel is next. Tyra asks if he could breathe as the water pours down. He says no and Tyra says she had the same struggle. Kelly thinks his arms are too pumped. Ms. J worries he may not be able to model suits but Tyra loves his shot. Scores: 8, 8, 7. Raelia is called next and she admits that she almost drowned when she was ten. The water triggered the memory but she pulled it together. Tyra praises her for doing so. Ms. J’s not impressed and Tyra suggests she study her face more. Scores: 7, 7, 6. And Ben follows. Kelly doesn’t like it and Tyra says he had a boom boom no. Social media suggests he work on his angles. Scores: 8, 7, 7. Then we have Mirjana. Kelly praises her body but says her face brings it down. Tyra says that keeping her mouth open made it look too sexy and thinks Mirjana thought it was her fierce model face. Scores: 7, 9, 7.

Matthew is next. He says that between the water and Tyra’s fake moaning a few seconds earlier, he’s distracted. Tyra’s like “Anything will turn you on, huh?” Kelly points out he’s been flirting with Mirjana. Tyra asks Mirjana, who says it’s over. Matthew says he doesn’t have anything else to add. Kelly and Tyra like his shot but wish it had more. More what? Scores: 8, 8, 8. We then see Shei’s shot and Kelly doesn’t like it. Tyra says she was sexy in the wrong ways. scores: 8, 7, 6. Romeo is next and Ms. J makes a Wizard of Oz joke. Tyra calls him androgynous. Scores: 8, 9, 7.

For Ivy’s photo, Kelly wished she had looked at the camera. She also tells Ivy to be more confident. Tyra compares the shot to Cheryl Tiegs. She and Kelly debate if Ivy should’ve looked at the camera. Ivy reads a social media comment about how the boys are doing much better than the girls. Scores: 7, 7, 7. Chantelle is next. Kelly hates it, Tyra loves it. Scores: 8, 8, 6. Tyra loves Kari’s body while Kelly wished she had opened her eyes. Scores: 8, 8, 6. And then there’s Lenox. Kelly and Tyra love it. Scores: 8, 8, 9. Tyra congratulates Keith for being the challenge winner. She then says that they were nervous about having Keith pull down his pants. Apparently, he’s hung. Tyra loves his picture and plays a video of someone who loves his picture as well. Scores: 9, 10, 7. Will’s last and Tyra calls him a hot mess. Kelly doesn’t think it looks like a model. Tyra though likes the shot. Scores: 7, 9, 5. Tyra dismisses the models so they can tabulate their scores as we go to…

COMMERCIALS!

ELIMINATION! Best photo goes to…Keith. He’s joined by: Lenox, Mirjana, Matthew, Denzel, Chantelle, Ben, Romeo, Kari, Adam, Raelia, and Shei. That leaves Will and Ivy in the bottom two. Will: Fell apart at fashion show. Shoot a hot mess, photo was amazing. Ivy: Didn’t impress the Next rep. Didn’t impress at the photo shoot. Who stays? Will. Damn, maybe Romeo really does have powers. Tyra tells Will he has strongest face in the competition but there’s more to modeling than that.

Tyra hugs Ivy and tells her she gets a second chance. That’s right—the comeback competition is still around! Ivy hopes social media will vote her back as she goes to the rubber room they must keep the eliminated contestants in.



America’s Next Top Model:

Adam
Ben
Chantelle
Denzel
Ivy
Kari
Keith
Lenox
Matthew
Mirjana
Raelia
Romeo
Shei
Will

So that was the first elimination! And I must say, I was surprised. I didn’t think Ivy would go so soon. I hope Will gets it together and stays around. As for the Mirjana/Matthew thing, I think Keith is right—she is young and she does have a lot of growing up to do. She wants people to be honest, but she wasn’t honest about her boyfriend and she didn’t come clean to Matthew in a direct way. She mentioned it in a conversation and then hid behind someone.

Next week: Makeovers! People get mad!

Quote of the Episode
“My grandmother is going to kill me.”—Lenox, about wearing nothing but silly string.

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