Thursday, August 25, 2016

Star Trek Beyond: To Boldly Go

I’ve reviewed the other ones, so I figured it was only fitting that I review the third movie in this trilogy.

Yes, it was sad to see Anton Yelchin after his untimely death in June. The world has been deprived of a great talent who had a promising career ahead of him. But his work as Chekov, especially in this film, will live on.

So let’s go beyond, where no SPOILERS have gone before!

Sunday, August 14, 2016

OUAT: Even Dwarfs Have Dreams

Last time on Once Upon a Time’s first season: Kathryn told David that she had been accepted into law school in Boston. After talking with Mary Margaret, he agreed he was going to tell Kathryn about them and that he couldn’t go to Boston. He did tell her the latter but omitted the former. Regina told Kathryn about the affair, leading her to confront Mary Margaret in the school hallway. Mary Margaret was heartbroken to learn David lied to her and that she was now the town harlot. She decided to break it off with David.

Emma learned the name of the mysterious stranger—August. He invited her out for that drink, taking her to the wishing well. However, he didn’t tell her he took the storybook and did something weird with it. He let her find it in a storm drain and she returned it to Henry, both excited.

In the past, Charming made a break for it ahead of his marriage to Princess Couldn’t Care Less. George’s soldiers pursued but Charming got an assist from an unlikely ally—Princess Couldn’t Care Less herself! She revealed she was in love with one of her father’s soldiers, Frederick, but he was turned to gold while saving Midas. There was a way to turn him back and she asked Charming to go get water from Lake Nostos.

Charming did so, facing down a nymph along the way. She transformed herself into Snow White to trap him but he was able to fight back, saving himself from the fate that had befallen others who had tried to get the water. He returned with the water, allowing Abigail to free Frederick. They were reunited and Abigail wished Charming luck in finding Snow.

He found Red instead and the two rode away from King George’s army in hopes of finding Snow.
Kathryn decided to give David and Mary Margaret her blessing and left Storybrooke. Regina stole the letter she wrote David, though, and burned it.

At the same time, the gym teacher found Kathryn’s car off the road…and abandoned.

Uh oh.

We open above the clouds. The Blue Fairy sits there and watches as a fairy in pink crash lands on one of the clouds. She holds up a bag before popping up to reveal everyone’s favorite adorably quirky actress—Amy Acker! She’s playing Nova, who is a fairy who longs to be a fairy godmother. Blue laughs at this dream and says she needs to master delivering the fairy dust, their most precious commodity, before she can do anything else. Disappointed, Nova follows Blue as some fairy dust falls out of the bag and dances on the wind.

(Hi, Amy Acker!)
The camera zooms down below ground where a dwarf says a giant egg is about to hatch. Another dwarf doesn’t believe so, saying that the whole group isn’t due to hatch until that night. But the first dwarf says that one must be impatient.

As they watch, the egg is broken up. Leroy leans out, his beard long and his expression wide-eyed. He’s also smiling as he takes in his new world. The other two dwarfs welcome him to it.

(Welcome, Dwarf!)

Sunday, July 31, 2016

OUAT: Bombshell

Last time on Once’s First Season: Gold repossessed florist Moe French’s van right before Valentine’s Day due to non-payment on a loan or whatever racket Gold is running. Moe got revenge by breaking in and stealing things from Gold’s house. One item in particular incensed Gold and he went after Moe despite Emma’s warnings not to. She rescued Moe from Gold, locking him up when he refused to explain why he was beating the man senseless.

In the Enchanted Forest, Moe was a duke named Maurice. He asked the Dark One for help in the Ogre Wars and Rumple’s price was Maurice’s daughter, Belle. She agreed to go be the Dark One’s servant to help her people. Over time, she and Rumple grew closer and she came to love him. He felt the same but feared it.

After killing her fiancé Gaston, Rumple tested Belle. He sent her out to the village, fully expecting her not to return. Belle met Regina, who told her about True Love’s Kiss. Eager, Belle returned home and used it on him. When he realized it, though, he flipped out and threw her in a cell. He then let her go, saying he loved his power more than her. Belle didn’t believe that but left.

Later, Regina went to Rumple and told him that Belle had died. She gloated before he threw her out of Dark One Manor.

Regina visited Gold in jail and gave him back his chipped teacup. She then got him to reveal that he has his memories and there was clear animosity between them. The episode ended with Regina going deep in the hospital to visit someone locked up—Belle.

We open in the Enchanted Forest. Princess Can’t Be Bothered is greeted by King George, arriving in No-Name Kingdom for her wedding to Prince “James.” She asks if everything’s alright and he assures her it is. He then turns to his knights and orders them to find “him.”

(She looks so beautiful and so bored)
“Him” is David, who is riding as hard as possible. The knights pursue him and he has to hide from them, pulling himself and his horse off the road. Confused, they turn back and David breaths out in relief…until he is knocked out.

(They'll never find me in this bright red cloak!)

Sunday, July 10, 2016

OUAT: Something There...

Last time on Once’s 1st season: In the aftermath of the storm, Henry’s beloved playground was torn down. Suspicious of Regina’s motives, Emma teemed up with Sidney to find dirt on the mayor. They thought they caught her stealing money to build a mansion for herself in the middle of the woods…but Regina revealed it was really to build a new playground to replace the one that was destroyed. Emma looked ridiculous and Regina looked good, just like she wanted when she had Sidney set Emma up.

We learn that in the Enchanted Forest, Sidney was the genie in the lamp. King Leopold found him and brought him back to his palace. There, the Genie fell in love with the queen and saw how lonely she was, how she was often ignored for Snow White. Regina asked him to kill the king for her so they could be together and the Genie did so. She then revealed it was all a trick and when the Genie used the wish Leopold granted him to wish to be with her always, he got trapped in her mirror. So Sidney is both the Genie of the Lamp and the Magic Mirror!

After Emma’s stunt, Regina banned her from seeing Henry. And it was revealed that August stole the storybook, though not why.


We open in a new place in the Enchanted Forest as several people are gathered around a map. Ogres are invading and the situation looks dire for this town. A young brunette in a familiar gold dress hovers, listening as the men wonder if “he” will come as promised. She tries to assure one of the men, her father, as knocking interrupts their meeting.

(Gee, wonder who this is?)
As everyone tenses up, the doors open to one. The Dark One then laughs, sitting in Maurice's seat. He says he’s come to help them as the lord grouses that he’s late. Rumple, though, still offers to give them help. And in return, he wants to keep Lord Maurice’s daughter. I’m sure you can already see where this is going, right?

(The beast?)
His daughter, Belle, steps up and volunteers to go. Lord Maurice and Gaston, her fiancé, are against it. She says this is how she will be able to help their people. Rumple tells her that it will be forever but she still agrees, making a deal with him.

As we all know by now, Rumple is the beast from Beauty and the Beast. Let’s check out the beginnings of Rumbelle, hmm?

Tuesday, July 5, 2016

The Nine Lives of Christmas

It’s that time of the year again! Yep, it’s time for Hallmark to reveal this year’s ornament and so the Hallmark Channel gets to bust out the Christmas movies for a week, even though we’re all floating in the pool right now.

But I’m going to post some things about the Hallmark Christmas movies to contribute to this week. So put on a Santa hat or reindeer antlers, put on some Christmas music and let’s pretend it’s December!

Ho ho ho SPOILERS!

Friday, July 1, 2016

Crown for Christmas: Hallmark’s Obligatory “Princess for Christmas” Movie

Seriously. Are they required to make one of these every Christmas season? They are going to run out of ways to do this plot.

As we enter Hallmark’s annual “Christmas in July” week, let’s take a look at 2015’s offering.

Watch out for SPOILERS!

Saturday, June 25, 2016

Outlander: Dining with the Enemy

Last time on “Outlander:” Jamie found his days jam-packed as he tried to juggle ruining Prince Charles’ cause from the inside and being a prominent Parisian businessman. Claire, though, found herself growing bored of gossiping at Louise’s—even as she discovered that Mary Hawkins was Frank’s ancestor.

However, Claire found a purpose when Master Raymond told her about a hospital in need of help. Murtagh escorted her down there and though Mother Hildegard is a bit suspicious at first, Claire soon won her over. Jamie, though, was less than thrilled about his wife spending all hours at the hospital—especially when he needed her. The meeting between the Minister of Finance and Prince Charles didn’t go as he thought and Jamie learned that Charles had secured a good amount of funding for his cause. He stormed out of the house and went to the brothel.

There, he found a young boy stealing from the patrons. Jamie chased him down and offered him a job. The boy, now named Fergus, agreed and went home with the Frasers. Jamie explained to Claire that Fergus could steal letters from Charles’ supporters so they could learn who the prince’s funders were. She admitted it was a good idea.

One of the letters Fergus took led Jamie to seek the help of Mother Hildegard, a trained musician. He and Claire were then able to discern that the Duke of Sandringham was Prince Charles’ benefactor. And so they plotted to have a dinner, hoping to dissuade the duke and anyone else from supporting the Jacobite cause.

Let’s see how that dinner goes, hmm?

I still really like the credits. Will the French chorus be dropped, though, once they go back to Scotland? Hmm…

We open in Versailles, where Jamie is playing a chess game with Duveney. Claire watches her husband and the Minister asks if they’ve thought of any names. She admits that she was hoping to name the baby after her uncle, Lambert. Jamie shoots it down as too English. He suggests a name that has Claire crinkling her noise in disgust.

(The Frasers...debating baby names)