It’s time for Thanksgiving on How I Met Your Mother. While other shows either focus on Halloween or Christmas episodes, this show has delivered great Thanksgiving episodes. So, let’s get into this year’s offering!
The gang all participated together—for the most part—so there are no individual plots. This will be more of an old-school style recap.
I now have an old-school style.
We start at MacLaren’s the day before Thanksgiving. Future!Ted says that he was hosting Thanksgiving that year, which I don’t think jives with show continuity. Didn’t “Slapsgiving” establish that Lily and Marshall always host Thanksgiving? Anyway, Ted’s decided that he’s not going to put stuffing in the turkey. He’s going to stuff a smaller turkey inside it! He dubs it a turturkeykey. He takes his leave, saying he needs to prepare the turturkeykey. Marshall wonders if Ted really wants to do that or if he wants to be like the Blitz.
Who or what is the Blitz? you may ask. Well, the Blitz is a title bestowed upon a person who is cursed—every time he leaves, something awesome happens. Marshall and Ted had a friend in college, played by Lost’s Jorge Garcia, who suffered from this. We see a scene of them in college, where “Blitz” gets up to head back to his room as Marshall and Ted enjoy some sandwiches. Just after he leaves, a pretty blonde comes in and realizes she isn’t in her room. And then, inexplicably, her towel falls off. Ted and Marshall finish telling the Blitz this story and he replies: “Aww, Man.”
Anyway, Ted wakes up the next morning to find the gang passed out in his living room. Robin’s face is painted like one of the members of KISS and the others have boas and other items strewn about. They wake up and tell Ted he missed some crazy times the night before. This includes something called “The Gentleman” and a skateboarding dog. Ted can’t believe this and heads into the bathroom. It is there that he discovers Zoey sleeping in his tub. He kicks her out and asks why his mortal enemy was in his tub. Lily replies that it’s a funny story but now Zoey is a friend. Ted doesn’t find this so funny, as it is his understanding that friends hate the same people their friends hate for no other reason. After all, he hated Renee Zelleweger because Lily did, only to find out she meant Reese Witherspoon! Lily explains that the gang initially hated Zoey upon seeing her the night previous and plotted ways to avenge Ted.
Barney ends an elaborate plan that sounds more like Zoey’s rape, scaring Lily. She focuses in on a nice scarf hanging from Zoey’s bag. She tries to casually grab the scarf but Zoey turns around, spotting her. Caught, Lily comes right out that they are friends of Ted and don’t like her. But Zoey recognizes Lily’s name. Turns out she’s a fan of Lily’s painting and has bought some of her paintings. And now she’s Lily’s best friends and was there for the awesome activities from the night before. In fact, she suggests a game of truth and dare, ending up daring Marshall to send a picture of his "junk” to some random number. Which ends up being provided by the Blitz! He was in on the awesome night as well! So much so, that he’s no longer the Blitz. In a quick scene, we see a puff of white smoke come out of Blitz’s mouth and float into Ted’s. Ted is now the Blitz, so Blitz asks to be called Steve again.
For all you Lost fans out there, I’m going to call him Hurley. That’ll be the extent of the Lost references as I didn’t watch the show. You may now insert your own Lost jokes where you see fit.
Anyway, Ted wants to forget about the awesome night he missed and to get Thanksgiving started. Which means getting the turturkkey in the oven! Ted asks that everyone comes into the kitchen so he doesn’t miss anything and they oblige. But then they remember that the awesome night eventually ended up at Ted and Robin’s, where they stood on the oven door. Ted is clearly upset when his oven door breaks off. So, they relocate Thanksgiving to Barney’s! Except Barney doesn’t have an oven that works. It isn’t even a real oven. So, they go to Lily and Marshall’s. But the sewage treatment plant suffered an explosion, so it reeks. The gang decides to try Hurley’s, but his mom uses the oven to store her cats’ litter box.
So, it’s back to Ted’s. But halfway there, Lily remembers that the night before, Zoey invited them to her place for Thanksgiving. She says she’ll be alone since her husband, the Captain, chooses to spend it with his daughter. And then she goes back to painting the face of a sleeping Robin. Ted is understandably against it, but they decide to go to Zoey’s anyway. That’s when they notice that Barney’s not with them. Barney hit up Ranjit for a ride, which causes the driver to point out that Barney left the group. That means he shall die become the next Blitz. Barney doesn’t think so but urges Ranjit to drive faster.
When he gets to Zoey’s, he finds the group covered in streamers. It turns out their cab ended up making a left turn and getting into the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade (highly implausible given the police barricades and spectators, but still funny). Barney begins to panic and does everything to try to stop being the Blitz. As he worries about that, Ted and Zoey wonder if enemies can become friends. They decide to ask an impartial third party—the guy Marshall sent a picture of his junk to. He sent back a picture of his own junk and thus is dubbed “Wang Guy.” They send him the question and he replies that enemies can become friends. Robin wants to know more details about Wang Guy while Ted decides to call a truce with Zoey.
As he goes to do so, he accidentally walks into Zoey. She was carrying a dish of something that ends up on her (white) shirt. She believes it was done on purpose and the two are fighting again. Lily tries to remind them of what Wang Guy said and of famous cartoon enemies that put their differences aside. Ted says that Wang Guy was wrong and then says that if Zoey were a cartoon, she’d be Cinderella’s evil stepmother. This clearly upsets Zoey, who throws them all out. After they leave, Barney comes back from the bathroom and is scared to find no one there. He sits down, missing as Zoey takes off her dirty shirt.
In the cab, the group wonders what went wrong. Lily states she was so mad, she decided to swipe something of Zoey’s. She regrets that of all the nice things in Zoey and the Captain’s apartment, she took a turkey plush. Ted reads the tag on the plush, noticing that Zoey was going to give it to someone named Hannah. Ted does some math: (Clip of Zoey saying the Captain preferred to spend Thanksgiving with his daughter) + (Clip of Ted calling her Cinderella’s evil stepmother and Zoey’s reaction) = Ted telling the cabbie to turn around so they can go back to Zoey’s.
Zoey comes out from changing her shirt (and probably setting it to soak in the bathroom sink, given how much time has passed since she threw the gang out) to find everyone sitting at her table. She is angry at first (and a bit upset that Barney had been in the apartment the whole time), but Ted interrupts to say that he knows she’d rather be spending it with her husband and her step-daughter. He understands it must be hard for her. Zoey breaks down and reveals that it would’ve been her first Thanksgiving where Hannah came over, but in the end she backed out. Ted gives Zoey the turkey plush back, saying that maybe she’ll be able to give that to Hannah the next year. She smiles and says she can’t wait to have some turturkeykey.
So, they all sit down and a truce is called. Future!Ted tells us (and his children) that that was how he and Zoey became friends. Cue the imaginary studio audience we all have in our heads saying “aww.” As the turturkeykey sits on the table, Barney leans down and Hurley goes to light a candle on the table. This sets off a chain reaction that ends with a black top hat flying through the air, doing flips in slow motion, and landing on the turturkeykey. Everyone exclaims “The gentleman!” while Barney realizes he missed something awesome. Again. And in case you were wondering, Future!Ted reveals that the turturkeykey tasted horrible. I’d imagine one or both of the turkeys weren’t completely cooked.
In the tag, Barney and Hurley leave Zoey’s apartment. Barney boards the elevator, but Hurley needs to go back for something. A young woman dressed in a nice evening gown, rushes to catch the elevator. We see her dress get caught in the door and hear the rip as it is pulled from her body. Barney celebrates as Hurley realizes he is once again the Blitz.
And I imagine Barney scored with the woman.
On Friday, the Pauley Center released the Top Thirty Funniest TV Holiday Moments.” Ranked on that list was “Slapsgiving” and all subsequent Thanksgiving episodes will now be compared to that standard for as long as Ted keeps trying to find the mother. And I liked this year’s entry. It advanced the Ted and Zoey plot while being slightly hilarious, particularly with all the zany things that happened when the designated Blitz was gone.
Sorry this was so long! I didn’t realize how busy my holiday weekend ended up being between family, the annual movie, volunteer work and the unexpected airing of “Celtic Thunder Christmas” on one of my PBS stations. But here it is! I’m just glad last night’s episode was a repeat!
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