OUAT: I Wanna See You Be Brave

(I really hope I don’t regret using that one so early)

Last time on “OUAT:” It was a story all about how everyone’s life got twisted turned upside down…Don’t expect me to continue rhyming. I failed that in preschool. So Isaac and Rumpelstiltskin rewrote the book, leaving Henry alone to save everyone. He ended up in the new Enchanted Forest where Snow was evil, Charming her dark puppet, Regina a bandit on the run from the queen, Hook a coward who worked for Blackbeard, Rumple a hero, Belle his wife, Baby Neal their child, Emma locked up in a tower and Zelena as sweet as apple pie, engaged to Robin Hood…who was more or less the same.

Henry and Hook rescued Emma but he lost his life while protecting them from Evil!Snow and Puppet!Charming. They convinced Bandit!Regina to crash Good!Zelena and Robin’s wedding but Isaac had already convinced Hero!Rumple to stop them. Bandit!Regina opted to save Henry but Robin abandoned Good!Zelena seconds after marrying her to stay by Bandit!Regina’s side as she died. Henry became the new author and saved the day!

Back home in the right world, Isaac was apprehended as everyone celebrated surviving yet another…curse? Yeah, we’ll go with curse. But Belle declared that Rumple was about to become the Dark One completely so everyone went to help him. The Apprentice removed the darkness but it would not be contained. It escaped into the night and when it tried to take Regina, Emma sacrificed herself to it and became the new Dark One.

Hang on tight, y’all and listen to Bette Davis here:

We open our premiere in Minnesota 1989. A wee Emma Swan goes to the movies to see “The Sword and the Stone” and oh look. A brick’s just fallen from the sky. I hope no one was injured.

(Seriously)

Wee!Emma eyes some of the children purchasing snacks enviously as she follows the rest of the home into the theater. Apparently they decided to be the rude people who come in the middle of the movie which kinda sucks for these kids. Anyway, wee!Emma wanders off and is able to snag a chocolate bar. She settles down with her loot when an usher tells her “Don’t.” Wee!Emma thinks she’s busted but the usher tells her that it’s not about the chocolate bar. He tells her that doing the wrong thing for the right thing can have dire consequences and that one day, she’ll have the chance to remove Excalibur from its stone. He tells her she mustn’t. It’s like telling a child not to dream big.

(Group hug Wee!Emma)

The usher disappears as Arthur pulls the sword from the stone and young Emma looks like she’ll never get anything ever again. Five minutes in and Merlin is already a dick.

You all figured out that was Merlin, right?

If not, sorry.

After the title screen (which shows Granny’s crashed in the middle of the forest), we pan over a great forest. Three knights on horseback ride over the credits (welcome to the cast, Rebecca and Sean!) and I promise this is not a Medieval Times commercial. No, it’s Arthur on his quest with Lancelot and Sir Some Guy (he’s not named but I believe he’s Sir Percival). They are so close to the sword but Arthur is concerned when he spots another horse already there.

The three knights race toward the Sword in the Stone and find Sir Kay there. He’s going to take the sword and be king. As he tries to pull it out, the sword determines if he is worthy and clearly he fails because he explodes. As they stare at the ashes that once were Sir Kay, Lancelot tells Arthur that it’s his turn.

(Oh, Sir Kay. We hardly knew you)
(No really)

Arthur takes a deep breath and approaches the stone. He gives the sword a tug and is able to remove it. But his joy is short lived as the trio realizes that it’s only half of the sword. They wonder where the rest is and Percival wonders what they’ll tell the people. Arthur says they won’t say anything except that he’s king. Then they’ll try to find the rest of Excalibur.

(Well, that's a problem)

The camera pans down Excalibur and transitions into the Dark One’s dagger with Emma’s name on it. Oh, snap! The dagger is the missing bit of Excalibur! Is this what Merlin was talking about?

Hook stares down at the dagger as Snowing and Outlaw Queen process what just happened. Robin wonders where Emma went, looking at the skies as if she’s going to swoop down. Regina rages against Emma and Mary Margaret admonishes her, reminding her that Emma saved her. Regina is well aware of that fact and as Lana said, she’s now pissed off she has a debt to repay. Hook grabs the dagger and orders Emma to appear but nothing happens as Henry runs up to check out what’s going on. As Hook keeps trying to get his girlfriend to appear, Regina tells him to cool it. He says that the dagger is supposed to summon the Dark One from any where in the world. Regina says that means Emma’s not in this world.

(Group hug Hook! Once he puts the dagger down, that is)

dun dun DUN!

We return to the great expanse of forest as we approach a medieval sewer cap. Okay, it’s the Dark One’s vault but come on. It looks like a sewer cap. Dark water fills it and it forms a person—Emma, wearing a weird gray outfit. Not sure why the darkness gave her that.

She stumbles around and is greeted by Rumpelstiltskin. Emma’s as confused as all the fans were when this picture was released around Comic Con time. She says that he’s in a coma back in Storybrooke but Rumple reveals he’s just the image the Dark One chose to present himself to Emma as. He figured it was the one she’d be most familiar and comfortable with, though he does offer to become Gorgon which was a fire-breathing boar. Emma’s fine with Rumple.

(It's an ROUS!)

Rumple offers to start training her but Emma doesn’t want to become the Dark One. She says she’s going to find Merlin and get him to take the darkness out of her. Rumple tells her just to give in but she says she’s not going to hurt the people she loves and who loves her. Rumple just laughs at that.

Everyone races back to Gold’s shop as Blue sits with the Apprentice. Oh, do we really trust her with him? Anyway, the Apprentice isn’t dead and he says that Emma’s gone back to the Enchanted Forest. He gives them a wand that will help them get to her, saying Merlin gave it to him. The Apprentice says it’s made of light magic but it must be wielded by someone using dark magic.

Then he dies.

(This episode is racking up quite the body count)

Regina picks up the wand and tries to use it. The music builds up to something amazing…but nothing happens. She tries it a few times before Hook tells her to stop before she makes a fool of herself. As Robin looks ready to kill Hook in the background, Regina lays into him. 

(Robin would totally have more than a conversation with Hook if Regina wasn't more than capable of fighting her own battles)

Hook tells her that she still has the fire but she’s no longer dark. She’s done too much good and our Evil Queen is no more. He tells her they need someone wicked. Regina doesn’t want to go anywhere near Zelena but Rebecca Mader is a regular now so…Yeah, looks like Zelena’s it.

Emma goes off, looking for Camelot. Rumple’s not for that and follows her as she finds a peddler. She asks him for directions to Camelot and he’s willing to part with that information for a price. When she says she has no money, he keeps upping the price until he can’t breathe. He raises in the air and Emma tells Rumple to stop. Rumple points out it isn’t him and Emma looks down to see her hand is extended. She pulls it back and the peddler falls to the ground, running off to safety. As Emma shakes, Rumple asks if she liked her first taste of dark magic.

(Uh oh)

At Gold’s, the Blue Fairy asks Belle if she’s going on the next grand adventure. Belle doesn’t think so as she doesn’t want to go far from Gold’s side. Things are still touch and go so she wants to be there in case he goes. So Blue conjures up the iconic Beauty and the Beast rose, giving it to Belle. She tells her that as long as the rose blooms, her beast lives. But she couldn’t make it smaller? Like maybe a necklace Belle can wear around her neck rather than carting that thing around?

(It's not as huge as it could be but still)

Regina, Hook and Robin go visit Zelena. She’s meditating in her cell but is intrigued when they say they need her help. Zelena wonders how bad the situation must be if they are turning to her…and then uses the moment to torment Robin some more. Regina puts a stop to it as Robin explains that Emma has become the Dark One. 

(Regina won't stand for Zelena touching Robin)

Hook tells her that they have a wand that can be used to take them to Emma but they need her to use it. She wants to know why she should help them and Robin pleads with her to think of their unborn child. She then tries to use his concern to twist the knife in Regina but Robin points out that he doesn’t care about Zelena, being an unwilling sperm donor. Zelena insults Robin’s performance in bed (probably because he had been manipulated and probably still didn’t feel comfortable being intimate with Marian despite his decision to try again with her) and Regina threatens to cut out her tongue. They decide to find another way to get to Emma that doesn’t involve Zelena.

I’d like to take this moment to say that I’m glad the show is portraying Robin as a victim. It wasn’t too clear after “Lily” and I know I wasn’t the only one afraid it was going to be another case of a TV show ignoring the fact that men can be victims of sexual assault. So I’m glad that Robin said he was an unwilling victim and that he was deceived. Sean also plays his scenes with Rebecca as someone who has been violated and is reliving it. He portrays Robin’s disgust and fear quite well.

Anywho, let’s cut back to Emma. She’s busy trying to ignore Rumple and someone on tumblr pointed out that he’s like the annoying tutorial you’d like to skip but can’t. He keeps needling Emma to use her magic, to give into the darkness but she’s determined to stay good and to get rid of the Dark One once and for all. Go, Emma!

Rumple decides to throw her a bone and says that if Emma can catch a will-o-the-wisp and return it to the stones, it can tell her where to find Camelot. And a wisp happens to fly past Emma at that moment! She chases after it but it is caught by a figure in a cloak. Emma chases after the person and when she calls for the woman to stop, she accidentally throws the woman down with her magic. The woman pops up, nocking an arrow as wild red curls fall about her face.

Ladies and gentleman, Merida!

Merida warns Emma that she’s a good shot and calls her a witch. This throws Emma but Merida says she knows a witch when she gets a magical push from one. Emma apologizes but explains she needs the wisp because she’s cursed and needs to get it lifted. Merida sympathizes and tells Emma she should be glad she’s not a bear. But she needs the wisp to save her family and her land.

Dropping her bow, Merida offers to fight Emma for it. She just makes a no magic caveat. Emma doesn’t want to fight and Rumple wants her to use her magic to take the wisp from Merida. Instead, they decide to go to the stones together. Merida says she can ask her question and then Emma can ask hers. Emma agrees and they continue on.

Hook enters Granny’s to find Henry there, reading. He tells the boy to use his powers as the Author to write the darkness out of Emma. Henry tells Hook he broke the pen because it was too much power and it corrupted Isaac. Resisting the urge to kill Henry because that’s the best way to get Regina to kill you on this show, Hook says there’s a way to help Emma but Regina won’t like it. Henry says he doesn’t need her permission and agrees to help Hook.

(Henry Daniel Mills!)

Emma tells Merida that they should break for the night but Merida is determined to keep on. Emma asks her when she slept last and when Merida can’t answer, Emma goes into Mom mode and gets her to get some rest. But Emma learns that Dark Ones don’t sleep. Rumple advises her to get a hobby, like knitting. Or turning straw into gold, which I assume was his. He also encourages her to kill Merida and take the wisp, but she refuses. She also forgets that she’s talking to herself, aloud, and doesn’t realize that Merida can hear her.

(Merida is seriously concerned)

Henry gets them inside the secret cells and Hook wonders how he did it. Turns out Regina’s password for everything is Henry’s birthday. He then says that he’s surprised she never changed it after a few bank statements, which means that Henry’s been taking money from his mother for a while now. He’s just lucky that Regina’s always had something distracting her and he better pray that Storybrooke doesn’t get a peaceful period or else she might finally sit down to reconcile her checkbook.

We learn the nurse that constantly watches over whoever Regina throws in the cells this season is named Nurse Ratchet and that’s awesome. Henry spills his soda on her and as she tries to clean herself up, Hook sneaks past and takes the key as the creepy janitor looks on. Wonder who he was in the Enchanted Forest.

Hook sneaks into Zelena’s cell and asks her to help him. She of course wants to know what she gets out of it. Hook pours a potion over his hook and explains that Regina gave it to him so he could take out Cora’s heart. He’s going to use it now to remove Zelena’s and make sure she does what he needs her to do. But Zelena’s taken a lesson from Regina and protected her heart with a spell. It throws Hook back and he’s stunned by the impact. And then when Zelena takes his knife and CUTS OFF HER OWN HAND. She removes the cuff and reattaches it but GOOD JONAS WOMAN! Zelena peaces out and Hook has to admit his plan backfired.

(*Screams in horror*)

And he has to admit it to Regina and the Charmings. Regina is ready to gut Hook but Mary Margaret reminds her that squabbling won’t help Emma. She says Zelena is out so they need to find her so she can use the wand and take them to Emma. Regina has a feeling she knows where her sister went.

We see Regina enter the Charmings’ loft as Robin comes down, saying Roland is down for his nap. I guess he’s on babysitting duty for Neal as well. Regina tells him that Zelena’s loose and that they need to get Roland so they can go some place safe. Robin smiles and says he likes it when she’s worried about him. He kisses her for a moment before recoiling in disgust, realizing it’s just Zelena in disguise. 

She drops the glamor and tells him that he must really love Regina before making a comment about how he never saw through her disguise as Marian. She says he’s the key she needs.

This scene had caused quite a stir when those who had gotten the advanced screening wrote about it. Some framed it as cause for Outlaw Queen fans to be concerned while others told us that it would be positive scene. And in the end, it was a positive scene—Robin saw through Zelena’s disguise. He only wants Regina. And it also seemed to confirm that if Marian had really been Marian last season, Robin’s kiss wouldn’t have been one of True Love. His heart has moved onto Regina.

Regina leads the others down the street as they approach Zelena. She’s standing outside the library, holding Robin captive with her magic. It also looks like he’s struggling to breathe as well. She tells Regina to give her the wand or Robin won’t live to the end of the day. Regina wants to know why she wants the wand so bad. Zelena says she’s going to use it to go far away from Regina and Robin so they don’t get her baby like Regina keeps getting everything. Zelena sees her baby as someone who will love her and love her alone. This might seem sweet but it’s troubling. She’s putting everything into the child’s love and we saw what happened to Regina when she did that with Henry and he rejected her. Anyway, she says she’s going to go back to Oz.

Mary Margaret pleads with Regina not to give Zelena the wand but Regina’s not going to lose Robin after just getting him back (seriously, it’s only been like two days). She hands over the wand and Zelena releases Robin, who collapses into his love’s arm. Zelena uses her six-leaf clover necklace to cast the spell, creating a cyclone.

But Zelena is immediately weakened and Regina rushes forward to slap the cuff back on her wrist. Regina admits to knowing the wand would do that and exploiting Zelena. She says that they aren’t taking the cyclone to Oz but to Emma instead.

(Mary Margaret is pleased)

Everyone gathers at Granny’s, deciding to use it to transport them to the Enchanted Forest. Regina waves the wand over Emma’s baby blanket, saying it’s Emma’s most treasured possession and that the yellow bug wouldn’t fit in Granny’s. They’ve tied Zelena up and retrieved both Roland and Baby Neal for the journey. Yet they’re still leaving Rumple in the care of Blue. Do we really want to do that?

(Aww, the baby blanket)

As the cyclone approaches, Leroy storms into Granny’s. We then get this adorable moment between Roland and Henry:

Regina tries to throw Leroy out, along with Happy and Doc, but Leroy refuses to go. He’s tired of sitting on the sidelines. After all, he’s supposed to be Snow’s closest friend. So he’s going to stand by her. Even if it means death. Happy’s not too sure about that but it’s too late to change his mind. The cyclone picks up Granny’s and sends them hurtling from Storybrooke.

(I hope it doesn't take any unsuspecting citizens with it)

Which couldn’t happen soon enough. It’s morning and Emma’s discovered that Merida has gone out without her. She runs after the Scot, trying to get the wisp so she could get to Camelot. But Merida explains that she needs it because her brothers have been kidnapped. The three other clans didn’t recognize her right to rule after her parents death so they took the boys for…some…reasons…I don’t know. She wants the wisp to help her save her family and her lands. Emma explains that she doesn’t want to hurt Merida but Merida lets loose an arrow. Emma catches it with ease.

Rumple convinces her to end this and take Merida’s heart. So she does, holding the organ in her hand. 

(Emma's a bit disoriented)

As Merida looks on, she’s about to crush it when Hook runs up to stop her. Emma is surprised to see the main cast running toward her. They say they’ve come to help her because it’s what they do and she’s pretty much the lead of the show, along with Regina. Everyone talks her down from embracing her darkness, especially Regina “Been There, Done That, Have the Vault of Hearts to Prove It” Mills. Emma puts Merida’s heart back and goes to hug her boyfriend.

She then checks with Merida, who is still reeling from having her heart outside her body. But she thanks Emma. She says she was going to ask the wisp for a way to destroy the clans who took her brothers but now she’s going to show them mercy. She’s going to find another way to rescue the boys and bring peace to her land. Emma wishes her luck and they part ways.

Mary Margaret tries to give Emma her dagger but she refuses to take it, afraid having control of it will speed up her conversion to the Dark One. Instead, she gives it to a very surprised Regina. But Emma reasons that of everyone there, Regina would be the only one who would be able to put her feelings aside and do what had to be done. Regina accepts the responsibility.

(Regina is very surprised)

Emma hugs Henry and then reunites with Hook. He promises to help her and she’s happy to see him. Together, they head back to Granny’s. Emma is surprised to see it…and Granny…and Leroy. But hey, as long as she doesn’t want onion rings, she’ll get some decent food while in the Enchanted Forest.

They hear horses approaching and look up to find Arthur and the blond knight (Sir Percival) riding toward them. Arthur says they’ve been waiting for them as Merlin predicted they would show up. He welcomes them and offers to escort them to Camelot.

(King of Impeccable Timing)

Everyone walks into the magnificent palace, awed. Well, everyone but Emma and Hook. They’re more focused on each other. Enjoy your moment, Captain Swan fans.

We go back to Storybrooke, where Sneezy and Sleepy are cruising through town. Sneezy is wearing Emma’s red jacket and her gray hat, which apparently is now considered the sheriff’s uniform as Sneezy boasts about how good his tenure as sheriff has been. They spot something unusual and speed back to town.

The main cast hits the floor at Granny’s. Man, floor is having an orgy tonight! Lucky dog. Everyone is dressed in Camelot clothes but the last thing they remember is entering Camelot. Everyone groans as they realize that they’ve lost time again. No one’s learned to start writing things down. Shouldn’t Henry have a journal or something? He is the Author and it’s his job to RECORD things.

(Floor is in heaven)

Moving on…The door opens and Emma steps forward. She’s wearing all black and her hair has gone platinum. Everyone holds their breath as they realize she’s the Dark One now. 

(Hot damn...I mean, Uh oh)

She spots Sneezy wearing her jacket and turns him to stone. Regina goes for the dagger but she doesn’t have it. Emma holds it up and tells them that they failed her in Camelot. So now they will all have to pay.

Uh oh.

What a premiere! It was a great start to the season and set up quite the mystery—how did Emma go dark? And how will they save her? Arthur is interesting though Merlin is a bit shady. Not as shady as the Blue Fairy, but I’m not going to trust him just yet.

Next time: A ball! Can Regina be a hero?

Screen caps from here.