Sunday, March 30, 2014

HIMYM: NOPE

We’ll get more into that title later.

Instead, we open at the Farhampton Inn in 2024. A snowstorm rages outside as Ted and the Mother sit inside, alone. She comments that they made it just in time and that the storm looked bad. Ted says that this isn’t the worst storm he ever encountered. He starts talking about the Fiero Fiasco, but the Mother has already heard the story. So he tells about the time he and Barney took over MacLaren and Lily got stuck on her flight back to New York…but the Mother heard that one too. So then there was the time Marshall got stuck on the roof while putting up decorations…which (sing along if you know the words!) the Mother has already heard. Ted wonders if maybe Lily told her the story, but the Mother points out that the story contains a word (“ragamuffin”) more suited to Ted’s vocabulary. (And mine. What?)

So the Mother decides to tell a few stories of her own, but Ted’s heard them all as well. They realized they’ve heard everyone one of each other’s stories. Ted declares that it’s official—they are an old married couple. After a beat, the two smile and high five each other in celebration.


Guess who is still working at the inn? Roger Bart! He says that the couple is going to be busy that night and asks that they don’t break a lamp like Robin and Barney did. Ted says that’s not how the lamp got broken but Roger doesn’t believe him. The Mother asks how the lamp got broken and Ted’s excited that there’s a story to tell.

The lamp was broken by a hockey puck. Robin and her sister (Lucy Hale) are playing hours before the wedding. Lily can’t believe it. She wants Robin to do something a normal bride would do. Like go through a memory book! Lucy Hale peaces out. Lily sits down and goes through the minutia of Barney and Robin’s relationship, punctuated with “And now you’re getting married.” Robin is having none of this, annoying Lily. Lily believes Robin should confirm to Lily’s idea of a bride, who gets all sentimental about getting married.

All Robin cares about is the fact that the Farhampton Inn has “The Wedding Bride Too” on pay-per-view. You all remember “The Wedding Bride,” the redundantly named movie penned by Stella’s ex-turned-husband which had a villain named Jed Moseby (Chris Kattan) that was based on Ted and was a big hit movie. Looks like he penned a sequel. Complete with the return of Jed. But now Jed has a friend named Narshall.

While Robin watches “The Wedding Bride Too” with Marshall—who joined after Lily complained about Robin’s behavior—Ted discovers Barney sneaking into another room at the inn. So he goes to investigate. For $20, Roger Bart reveals that the room is registered to a Susan Tup. Ted goes barging in, asking where the woman is and ignoring the bazillion racks of suits in the room. Barney gets Ted to say the name fast: Sue Tup. Ted asks why he is surrounded by suits and Barney reveals he’s having a panic attack. He can’t find the right suit to wear to his wedding. Ted is confused as Barney had Tim Gunn tailor one for him. But Barney says it feels wrong.

So he and Ted go through each one of his suits, but nothing seems to please Barney. At last, Ted hits on the problem: Barney is transferring his pre-wedding jitters onto his suit. He gives Barney a pep talk and voila! The suit is perfect.

Ted and Barney join “The Wedding Bride Too” viewing party in the bride’s room. Though Lily may have gone off the deep end. She’s walking around in her wedding dress. Turns out Lily wants to get some better wedding pictures, ones that don’t include Marshall’s panic-induced haircut. Robin’s cool with that. Which only infuriates Lily more. As she gets ready to explode, the Mother reveals she has heard this story. Ted’s like, “No way. Really?” The Mother’s like, “Yes, really.” But she lets him continue.

Lily finally reveals why she’s so upset. This may be the last time they are all in the same place together. Ted’s going to Chicago, which everyone knew because these five cannot keep a secret to save their lives. As this sinks in, they decide the best way to handle this upsetting thought was to avoid it. They settle in to watch the rest of “The Wedding Bride Too” as Robin runs out to get ice.

Out in the hall, she spots a woman going into a room. It’s Tracey Ullman! Robin stops and says, “Mom?” Yep! Robin’s mom has arrived!

The Mother isn’t surprised, saying no mother would miss her daughter’s wedding. Ted chokes up and has to look away. The Mother takes his hand and asks him to tell her another story. He says she’s heard it before, but the Mother doesn’t care.

So as the storm continues to rage outside, Ted continues to tell stories to the Mother.

Why is my title then “NOPE”? Well, there’s been a theory floating around about the Mother. It says that the reason Future!Ted is telling this story to his kids (who we now know are named Penny and Luke) is because the Mother is dead. And the last scene between the Mother and Ted may bolster that. Was the Mother just diagnosed with something and that’s why they are having that weekend away? Is it something that might mean she won’t be around for Penny’s wedding?

And I’ll admit—I don’t want to think that the Mother is dead. I want there to be a happy ending when the show signs off. So I refuse to believe this theory.

What do you believe, readers?

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