Pick Your Poison

It’s feuding time this week on How I Met Your Mother. So put on your gloves and put ‘em up.




Plot “A”: Marshall left GNB to pursue his dream of being an environmental lawyer and Barney took it poorly. So did the rest of GNB, apparently. Prospective employers call GNB for a recommendation for Marshall and they trash talk him. One manager tells the environmental group he didn’t wear pants and was found clubbing a seal with another seal. The first part sounds bad enough, but the second part is just outrageous. But, this is a sitcom and is thus governed by Rule of Funny. So the man doesn’t allow Marshall to explain and dismisses him. Upset, Marshall goes to GNB where he discovers Zoey still protesting out there. He tells her his story and she recruits him to her cause.

Which pisses off Barney to no end. Marshall is now a traitor and the two start brawling. It gets so bad, they are kicked out of MacLaren’s. The entire group. So Lily and Robin decide they need to reconcile Barney and Marshall, fast. And they decide alcohol is best. But they have to find the perfect alcohol. They compare notes to find out what happens when one consumes a particular alcohol. One (I forgot which) makes Barney very introspective. Gin makes Marshall very argumentative. Cosmos make Lily very uninhabited. Daiquiris make Marshall feel sexy. Another drink turns Barney into Richard Dawson. Bourbon makes Ted think he can beat-box. And Absinthe…well, it’s illegal for a reason.

So, the girls take the guys out to a bar (which looks like the place they took John Lithgow) and start to liquor them up. They start with gin, which gets the two arguing. They progress through the others, until daiquiris have the men feeling good. Robin and Lily believe a reconciliation is almost about to happen. They turn their backs for a moment and the guys disappear. They had ordered shots on their own. Lily sniffs their empty glasses—tequila. (Which is my poison of choice). Lily panics, but Robin knows where they went.

We go back to MacLaren’s, where the group gets unbanned. Marshall and Barney are friends again. Robin and Lily wonder what magic brew they were given to do so. It was beer. And I wonder why they didn’t think of that before.

The next morning, the girls arrive with breakfast to discover that Barney and Marshall are still arguing. They try to figure out what happened. Robin realizes that the celebratory round of champagne the night before was one drink too many. They forgot they made up. The girls throw their hands up and down their frustrations in absinthe.

Plot “B”: Ted and Zoey. Yes, they are still together. And they are going on a romantic weekend to Martha’s Vineyard. Or at least, that was the plan. Until they started arguing about the Arcadian. So, Ted turns around and books them a room at the Arcadian. Complete with rodents!
Ted offers Zoey a challenge: If she makes it to the end of the weekend, Ted will join her cause. If she doesn’t, she has to drop her campaign. She agrees, determined to make it the entire weekend. And thus, their weekend begins. It features the aforementioned rodents, learning there is only one bathroom and Ted wondering if one can catch an STD from the ghost of a prostitute. They also learn that every time someone flushes, their lights either turn off or turn back on.

Ted finally asks Zoey why she cares so much about the Arcadian. And Zoey tells him. She grew up in the Arcadian. Well, that was a surprise. I thought her response was going to be “I don’t know” or along those lines. But no, she grew up in the hotel. Her mother moved to the city and lived there with her two daughters, telling them it was a castle. While the Arcadian was all ready going downhill, Zoey and her sister believed it was a castle. She explains that was the best childhood she could ask for and Ted is touched.

As the lights come back on, they spot the cockamouse. Ted recognizes it from his apartment and is glad to see it found a home. And that it had kids, so there are more cockamice (?) around now. Zoey flips when she sees it though and tells Ted he won, running from the room.

However, at the apartment, Ted reveals he’s joined Zoey’s side. Barney is upset as well.

Plot “C”: Actually, there was no plot C. There was some interesting hints about Robin’s home life though. She mentions some awkward dinner moments between her father, her mother and her father’s mistress. Whose name was Brandy. And apparently her parents liked to share Brandy. Robin laughs about how families are but Lily tells her that hers is in a class by itself.

This wasn’t a bad episode, but I don’t think it was a knockout. I do like the direction Barney and Marshall’s relationship is taking and the fact that Barney is taking out his issues with his father on his friend. They are hinting at some more of Robin’s childhood which is intriguing. Her parents’ marriage now shows why she is so set against marrying someone. As for Ted and Zoey, I’m over them. I think they would be good together, but they’ve revealed that the relationship ends. And it ends badly. So now I’ve just been waiting for it to end.

And how exciting is it that the season finale is almost upon us? It’s also a bit strange. It feels like the premiere wasn’t too long ago and now we’re almost at the end for this season. I cannot wait to see about the wedding!

ETA: Well, I feel stupid! I forgot about the REAL "C" plot. Robin notices this woman walking by their booth suspiciously. She tells Lily that the woman wants their booth. So, they stake their claim and refuse to leave...until Marshall and Barney get everyone thrown out of MacLaren's. Faster than you can say "Bob's your uncle," the woman and her friends take the booth. In the tag, Robin and Lily stakeout the booth. A messenger arrives with a picture--Barney doing something nasty on that table--and the women run off in disgust. Lily and Robin race in with buckets and disinfectant to reclaim the gang's territory.