Barney’s Suits vs. Hot Bartender Barbie

It’s How I Met Your Mother’s 100th Episode and we still don’t know WHO the mother is! Will we come closer tonight? Maybe.

We see the kids STILL sitting on the couch after 100 episodes as Future!Ted says that one day they may meet someone special. He looks up and sees a frat boy. He then pans the camera to Rachel Bilson, who tells a kid that she’s not going to his frat party. Ted confiscates the beer but lets the Frat Boy keep his Mike’s Hard Lemonade. Ted and Rachel enjoy a beer. Turns out Rachel was in the class Ted made a fool of himself in during the premiere. Could she be the mother? Are they actually moving forward? Possibly, as she says she dates “cute idiots” exclusively.

CREDITS!

At the apartment, the gang tells him not to screw it up. Then they hear a commotion coming from MacLaren’s. Barney deciphers it—MacLaren’s has hired a hot female bartender. Barney immediately wants her, Robin’s jealous and Marshall thinks she isn’t as hot as Lily. That annoys Lily. Meanwhile, the guys keep falling over the new bartender. She is rude to Barney, though, confusing him.

Ted goes to visit Rachel’s apartment. Future!Ted says his picks up the mother’s cute little yellow bus. He asks Rachel about it. She says it’s her roommate’s. Meanwhile, my sister is doing a dance of joy as she called the mother being the roommate.

Ted asks Rachel (“Cindy”) for a description of her roommate. She responds: “Whore.” But then admits it’s because she’s jealous. Guys keep falling for her roommate. Ted promises to not fall in love with her roommate (Future!Ted: “Oops”). Meanwhile, Lily is still on about how Marshall is not interested in Hot Bartender Barbie. Barney asks Marshall why Hot Bartender Barbie isn’t interested in him. Turns out, Hot Bartender Barbie was dumped by three Wall Street execs and now hates people who wear suits. Barney vows to stop wearing suits, despite the fact he already wears them—we see a picture from Summer 2009 of Barney skiing in a suit—and Marshall and Lily gasp.

Rachel and Ted continue to have their date but she goes on about the Roommate. She paints robots doing sports and makes breakfast foods sing showtunes. Ted is enamored, but lies about it to Rachel. Meanwhile, Barney actually suits down. Hot Bartender Barbie is now interested.

The next day, Ted learns that the college has a strict policy regarding faculty-student relationships. She doesn’t want to risk her scholarship and breaks it off. He tries to get support from the gang to power on, but they tell him to let it go. But Future!Ted tells us that Barney is having trouble letting go as well. We see him practically molest a suit-wearing Marshall before he disappears into the bathroom where he has a suit hidden. He puts it on and…it rips.

Barney dashes through the streets of New York, trying to save his suit. However, his personal tailor, TIM GUNN, couldn’t save it. He asks Barney if another suit could use his’ buttons. Barney tearfully asks “Like an organ donor?” At TIM GUNN’S affirmative, he agrees.

Back at MacLaren’s, Barney holds an urn with the ashes of his suit. Robin thinks Barney will stop going after Hot Bartender Barbie. He says his suit didn’t die for Barney to give up. This inspires Ted to fight for Rachel, his house in Westchester, his two kids and three dogs named “Frank,” “Lloyd” and “Wright.” Hot Bartender Barbie comforts a grief-stricken Barney. They go out while Marshall realizes that Lily thinks Hot Bartender Barbie is hotter than him. Robin proves to them that Hot Bartender Barbie’s hotness is only circumstantial. She goes behind the bar and Lily gets all hot and bothered. The owner kicks Robin out.

Ted brings his yellow umbrella to Rachel’s. He tries to get a second chance, saying that the rules also states not to teach drunk but he does that “all the time.” He points out things that show they are compatible, but they are all Rachel’s roommate. She orders him out. Future!Ted says that was not the night he met their mother, but it was the night their mother got her yellow umbrella back.

At Barney’s, Hot Bartender Barbie discovers Barney’s closet of suits. She makes him chose between her or the suits. He thinks and then Neil Patrick Harris breaks out into a SHOWSTOPPING number about how he loves suits, complete with a suited dancing chorus and parts sung by suited Ted, Marshall, Robin and Lily. All I can say is if you missed it, YOUTUBE it and that the song better be on iTunes. After the song, Barney still chooses Hot Bartender Barbie.

No tag.

This was one of the best episodes in a while. I thought Rachel Bilson was great, but I’m glad she’s not the mother. And Barney’s song was lovely.

HAPPY 100th EPISODE HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER!

Exchange of the Episode:

“My name isn’t Boomer.”

“That’s funny because in my head, it’s Boomer.”

--Rachel and Frat Boy