Dead Ringer for Joseph

Last week on “Any Dream Will Do”: There was a double elimination! Lee and Lewis continued to lead the pack and Ben got rave reviews. He still ended up in one sing-off, though, but was saved. Seamus was sent home after his arrogant Joseph edit finished. Antony was also sent home and I worried his girlfriend would go on a murderous rampage, starting with Zoe.

Graham introduces the “Song of the King” by banging the gong. My sister loves Craig…mostly because he’s Scot. I’ll confess, this was my least favorite song growing up. I’d always fast-forward it when listening to it, trying to fall asleep. Now, I enjoy it. Just to show how tastes can change. But my favorite song is still “Close Every Door.” Anyway, the boys finish the song.

Graham introduces the panel: Zoe Tyler, Bill Kenwright with his own Joseph scarf, Denise van Outen, and John Barrowman. The Phantom’s Overture plays to introduce Webber. Graham says the Josephs are one big happy family, which shows clips of the boys talking about the stress and trash talking the others.

Coming Up: My sister’s Scottish love.

Ben and Craig are up first. We see Ben getting hugged by his mother after being saved. And that’s it. Huh. Way to short him, show. Craig’s parents have cutout pictures on his face on sticks. Not creepy AT ALL. My sister nearly has a heart attack when they show his girlfriend, but I assure her this was two years ago. She thinks there was more Craig because of the creepy factor. Graham says that Joseph was written in 1967, so the boys will be performing songs from the past four decades. Webber wants acting from both, especially Craig so it’s not Cabaret.  Ben’s up first with “Addicted to Love.” Not bad, though my sister cringed at one point. But he does exude sex appeal. Craig follows him with The Four Seasons’ “December 1963 Brackets Oh What a Night” (actually quote). My sister nearly dies. He has a very beautiful voice and fits the song well. I think he’s upped the acting a bit more.

Graham asks about Ben’s sing-offs. He says he’s there and picking himself up. Craig was also saved last week and is grateful to Webber. Oh god, his parents brought those creepy masks with them?! Zoe starts with Ben and his bum notes. But she feels he’s improved and has star quality. As for Craig, she says he was better vocally than bed but not as much star quality. She wants him to go that extra mile but is unsure if he’s there. Bill follows and wants to help Craig. He wants him out of the comfort zone and to get the edge. He calls Craig great and says he can go far. He calls Ben a contender. He says Ben’s smiles light up the place and the audience was addicted to him. Webber says he was saving Ben and Craig, not sending Antony and Seamus home. He then says he wasn’t sure if he should’ve saved Ben and is worried. He praises Craig. I’d say that Ben better get enough votes else Webber would send him home.

Coming Up: Lee gets a bad critique. The hell?  

Lee and Keith are next. Lee thought he was average and is not pleased. Rehearsals are painful. Zoe fears he’ll burn out. Keith follows about his family coming to support him. Does anyone else think that Keith looks like he could play a younger Jack Harkness (John Barrowman) on Torchwood? Lee sings first with “All Right Now.” Another song now appropriated to commercials. Yeah, I can see why Lee gets the bad critique. It’s not his week, not helped by the fact my TV cut out his vocal. Thankfully, I have a DVR so I can rewind. Thank you, Verizon FiOS. Keith follows Lee’s performance with “Love Is All Around.” All I can think of is “Love Actually” and Bill Nighy’s performance of “Christmas is All Around.” Keith’s diction is still improving and he’s a great vocal. He’s also a good actor.

Critique time! Graham talks to Lee about being his own worst critic. Keith talks about singing “Close Every Door” but never finishing. John gets this round. He thinks that they are serious contenders but Lee struggled a bit. He was impressed with Lee’s professionalism. He calls Keith’s performance “vocal perfection.” Denise agrees Keith is a major contender and that they both have star quality. But she wasn’t thrilled with Lee’s performance. Zoe agrees with the two, calling Lee “a bit rubbish.” Graham leaves the panel and goes to Webber. He tells Lee that he gave it all in rehearsal but that he needs to save his voice for the main show. He wants Keith to show him a more grown up side.

Coming Up: Lewis gives an impromptu song.

Lewis and Rob the builder follow Lee and Keith. Lewis doesn’t want to slip up. He talks about not fitting in because he liked to sing. He said he was bully. He went to a stage school so he could be around others who were like him. Rob wants to prove he could be Joseph. So he gets a shave and a haircut. Webber wants better posture from Lewis and wants Rob to prove he’s more than a builder and wonders if Michael Crawford could build a conservatory. Crawford wonders why he got dragged into this. Lewis sings “Dancing in the Moon.” Lewis’ performance comes complete with a moon! We get a shot of Nana Jean. I think Lewis could definitely be a big West End star. Heck, he could over here and be a big Broadway star. Rob sings “Back for Good.” I don’t think high notes are Rob’s friend but otherwise, he’s a good actor. He makes me believe his girlfriend has left him and he wants her back. And there’s a girl wearing a hard hat in the audience. That’s sweet.

Graham says that Webber was worried about Lewis learning the lines. He asks if he could name all the colors of the coat. The audience claps along. He gets pretty far down before stopping. Graham asks if Webber could do it. Rice is going home thinking “I can.” Rob tells the judges he has no bad techniques to get rid of. Brilliant! Bill is up first and he praises Rob. He tells Rob though he was a bit nervous and to get over it. He tells Lewis to go to Keith’s level because he could be Joseph. Zoe is next. He says Lewis cracked and needs to work on his breathing. She tells her to sort her head out and get back in the competition. Zoe says she thought Rob was okay but doesn’t like Rob’s soft side. Webber thinks there’s a side of Lewis we’re not seeing. He wants to see Lewis’ comedic side to get him out of his shell. He says Rob has talent but he has something that needs to get out as well.

Coming Up: John and Denise bring out the claws.

Last up are Chris B and Daniel! (I could probably stop calling him Chris B now, right?) We get to see Chris B crying. He says he’s a leading man. He and Webber see how many sentences they can say which include the word “worry.” Webber coaches him through rehearsal. Zoe says Daniel has a fantastic voice but doesn’t think he can be Joseph because he’s too nice. Chris sings “All Night Long.” I think the Josephines have been wearing the same outfit for every guy with just changes in colors. Once again, I don’t think Chris is quite ready to be a leading man but there’s a potential he needs to tap into so he can get to that stage. Daniel finishes us off with “All About You.” All this does is show that Daniel is a nice guy. He should’ve been given a song where he had to be the bitter ex or something like that. Either way, he has the singing chops.

Graham asks about Chris’ nerves and about Daniel’s musical ambitions. He asks about Daniel’s song for the musical Cats. They play a clip of him singing it. Everyone applauds. John gets to go first and says they have stage presence. He doesn’t think Chris hasn’t recovered from his knocks. He calls him bland and wants the old Chris back. He calls Daniel “nice, nice, nice.” He wants to see the naughty Daniel, eliciting catcalls from the audience. Denise says she sees a platter of cheese. She wants Chris to be toughened up and wants to see something different from Daniel. He argues that he showed a different style, showing his innocent side. John says they still wanted a different side. He then argues with audience, who yelled to give him a better song, that actors sing whatever song they are given. Webber disagrees with the panel about Daniel. He thinks Daniel succeeds. He’s not sure about Chris.

Coming Up: Meat Loaf?

Meat Loaf is on the show. Graham mentions Meat Loaf’s musical theater background. He tells the boys to believe every word they sing, to become that character. John nods in the background. Webber says he doesn’t see any difference between musicals and rock. It’s either good or bad. A group performance? What? The boys sing Meat Loaf’s “Dead Ringer For Love.” Excuse me while I get up and dance. Graham tries to quiet down the audience. They show a show from 1972 called “The Liver Boys” which had Bill Kenwright. Everyone gets a good laugh.

Coming Up: A Joseph Mission? Dare I hope?

HOLY CRAP IT’S A JOSEPH MISSION! I LOVE YOU PRODUCERS! John visits the house and is horrified. He sends them to Les Mis’ barricade set to run them through their paces. The actors show them how to scale the barricade and then sing “Do You Hear the People’s Sing?” They aren’t thrilled with Lee’s, Daniel is clearly out of breathe. Keith, Lewis and Chris are all out of breath as well. The actors say they have to be more serious. The audience laughs as Chris finishes. Ben excels at this mission, the actors are pleased. They also love Craig. My sister, were she still up, would be pleased.

Meat Loaf performs “Cry Over Me.” I have a friend who would be dying right now.

Coming Up: Elimination time!

Graham announces the results. Keith is safe. Daniel is also safe. Rob could still be Joseph. All the hardhats in the audience applaud. Lee’s bad week didn’t hurt him—he’s safe as well. Chris prays but to no avail. He’s in the sing off. Ben is safe. Craig and Lewis are called down as Chris joins them. Lewis is safe, meaning that Craig is in the sing off. Lewis hugs…some…guy…Anyway, Craig and Chris perform “The Long and Winding Road.” Already I say that Craig excels, hands down. He has the stronger vocals and the stronger stage presence.

They go before Lord Andrew Lloyd Webber. With no frills, no frittering, Webber just comes out and says he’ll save Craig. Told you he’d get it hands down. Chris says he wanted to win and is sad he has to leave now. He says that Lewis will be the one to win. Graham sends him center stage to say good-bye. The boys singing “Poor, Poor Joseph” before Chris starts “Close Every Door.” John mouths the words. Denise looks like her heart is broken. Daniel and Lewis take off Chris’ coat. He finishes the song strong. Bravo, Chris.

Could Still be Joseph:

Rob

Lee

Chris B

Daniel

Craig

Keith

Seamus

Antony

Lewis

Johndeep

Ben

Chris C

Next week: John Barrowman coaches the remaining seven on acting as the (not-so) live shows continue!

Quote of the Episode:

“Ooh, it’s like the Brady Bunch”—Graham after eight screens of “I will be Joseph”.

Do you think like I do that Chris wasn’t ready for the West End stage just yet? Disagree with the decision? Are you as happy as I that they finally showed a Joseph Mission? Also, thanks to everyone who links my blog to other sites! Glad to get the exposure!