I Think Tyra and Ms. J Have Found Their Next Runway Challenge!

NEW YORK! Someone named Haley is stalked by the paparazzi as camera go off constantly. One photog gets a smell of Haley and suddenly goes from snapper to slapper. He fights with Haley’s escort as Haley screams. Neither survive the fight. Meanwhile, it’s fashion week! And as models do their little turn on the catwalk, on the catwalk, do their little turn on the catwalk, a bodyguard goes insane when he sees a model. He attacks her and everyone stands around doing nothing as he kills the model. Then they do something. 

Felix introduces Hood and Rachel to our two crime scenes. And then Rachel and Felix have to explain that Haley Vaughn is a popular model. Hood decides to go for the crack and booze first, which Felix goes to test. We tick to the credits…

And, unlike me, the show does refrain from busting out either Right Said Fred’s “Too Sexy” or RuPaul’s “Supermodel.” I’m afraid I will probably use the latter some time later, so…mea culpa.

We come back to a lab as the techs get to swab everything down. You know, there could’ve been a chance for a shout-out. Jerry Bruckheimer produces Eleventh Hour as well as CSI: NY and Without a Trace, all set in New York. One shout out, please. Rachel and Felix are already in the FBI. Anyway, Felix interrogates the bouncer, who is surprised at his own behavior. Felix confides that he was a bouncer in a strip club. I believe it. Anyway, he says it just gets to you—all the skin. The bouncer agrees he just snapped and felt he and the model had a connection. Rachel interviews Haley, who says she uses new stuff all the time and doesn’t know why this happened.

We cut to an Ugly Betty-ish receptionist at Haley’s agency. She is leaving a message for a date who left early from a date due to a phone call. Oh, I hope it wasn’t a bailout call. She berates herself for her cheesy message and then shows Rachel and Hood into Haley’s escort/manager’s partner/wife’s office. The wife admits that their marriage wasn’t so good lately but still praises her dead husband’s work ethic. Hood asks if her husband was doing or using anything different. She says no but admits they hadn’t seen each other due to Fashion Week. She breaks down but Hood isn’t convinced. Rachel thinks their best bet is to talk to Ugly Betty.

By the way, the actress playing the assistant is Samantha Shelton, Marley Shelton’s real life sister. It’s a family affair!

Meanwhile, Haley’s doorman Tom brings her her mail. He too is enthralled by her…or rather, her perfume. He forces his way into the apartment. This does not bode well. We cut back to Rufus Sewell watching the Shelton sisters act. Ugly Betty—I’m sorry, Gretchen—tries to keep her boss’ secret to protect his wife. But Rachel gets her to admit to dead manager’s affair with Haley. So, it’s to Haley’s Rachel and Hood go. They spot the door open, which sends up a red flag. As Rachel says, nobody leaves the door open in New York—no matter how safe you think your building is. They discover Haley’s body and the doorman crying on the fire escape. He doesn’t know why he did it, staring at his bloody hands. Then he just falls and we hear him hit a car below as Marley’s eyes grow big.

I read somewhere that the monotone Comcast commercial is supposed to be full of subliminal messages. If it is, I’m missing them.

NEW YORK! Danny and Stella…no, sorry, wrong show…Hood stops the ME from taking Haley after spotting odd spots on her wrists and neck. Rachel finds some perfume. Hood asks Rachel how she puts her perfume on. She responds: wrists and neck. Where the spots are…Hmm…At the agency, Gretchen receives her boss’ mail—it contains the perfume box. She’s distracted when Rex, the guy who left her, calls. Apparently that phone call was a real emergency—he had to go visit a family member, I assume. They set up a second date. Aww, Gretchen. She’s happy and doing better than Ugly Betty has since Gio and Henry left.

Hood and Rachel go on a tour of the perfume plant with an employee who gives us a history lesson of perfume. Though his assistant, Renny, gives us the dour side—use of perfume to cover the plague. Hood points out that companies don’t have to list the ingredients in perfumes, unlike food. But the manager promises that they don’t use any odd things in their perfumes, just natural ingredients. Rachel shows him Fervor, the perfume taken from Haley. He says they sent it to the top 100 influential people in the fashion industry. When informed Haley’s dead, he refers her to the company lawyer. She protests that the perfume is safe and there is no need to pull the product. The manager protests that he perfected Fervor and it is safe. But they agree to let Hood test it and Rachel says if anything odd pops up in the perfume, guess who is getting the blame? The lawyer tells the manager it will be him.

Felix joins Hood in the lab, saying Rachel is in the coroner’s office. Hood tells him to write things down: Vanilla, Honeysuckle, Jalapeno Pepper, Civet Musk…Sounds like Bath and Body Works line. Felix remembers they use beaver glands and whale fat, but Hood says not so much. But they work on the theory that a tainted ingredient may be the cause. Meanwhile, the manager talks with Renny, asking him to certify the perfume is clean. Renny is silent until the manager asks if everything was done properly. All Renny replies is that he did everything the manager asked him to do. Sounds like someone isn’t too happy with his job. Manager takes a bottle of Fervor out of a safe.

NEW YORK! In a nice hotel room, the manager plays a hooker…sorry, “escort”…to sit on the bed and put on Fervor. You know, I wouldn’t have this problem—I’m allergic to perfumes. Wouldn’t wear them and would be too clogged up to notice them.

Rachel returns to the lab with the discovery the perfume is the one thing in common. Hood believes the manager is using pheromones, which Felix knows it is used to attract mates. Hood explains that only certain people are attracted to certain smells, so chemistry isn’t a myth. Meanwhile, the escort is getting restless about doing nothing and tries to leave for her next appointment. The manager attacks her and restrains her. We tick to commercials…

NEW YORK! Another crime scene and still no shout out to Mac or Stella or anyone. Felix tells us the escort shot the manager, most likely in self defense judging by that last scene before the break. Hood goes to talk to Lyla, the escort. He knows it is self defense and asks her if he made her wear perfume. He asks to see her wrists—there are marks. She says he was just making notes and then snapped. Hood explains it was an experiment that went wrong. Lyla is even more distressed to learn she was a guinea pig but Hood assures it that the manager was the lab rat, not she.

Hood returns with his FBI detail to the lab and says that the perfume they tested was a decoy. He runs the perfume in the hotel and finds: a chemical that serves a messenger to the brain. The one in the perfume makes people crazy. They realize someone else is tampering with Fervor. So they go back to the company and note that Renny challenged the Fervor patent because he wasn’t credited. They realize he is behind it, especially since he called in sick. The lawyer brings them to their clinical trials. Hood realizes the perfume was leaving a mark before it started out as a potential self-tanning lotion using neuro transmitters. However, the trials showed that the self-tanning lotion also served as an aphrodisiac. But it’s down side was a violent streak. Rachel wants to round up the samples.

Gretchen, though, decides to spray Fervor generously. Something tells me the date with Rex is about to go south fast. Felix says they almost have all the perfumes back and then he will join in the search for Renny. Hood also asks him to get an inhibitor that would block receptors in the brain from processing the perfume. Meanwhile, Haley’s agent’s wife realizes Gretchen took the perfume. Gretchen doesn’t pick up her phone as she takes a cab driven by a driver more invested in his fare’s life than Ranjit on How I Met Your Mother—and Ranjit is their primary driver. The driver becomes affected and gets creepy. He turns off the route and Gretchen panics. As he admits he loves her perfume, we tick to commercial…

Rachel keeps trying to reach Gretchen as Felix searches the company’s security system for Renny. They find him looking through the manager’s office and taking an invite to fashion week. Spiffy. Felix moves out as a cop pulls up to meet Rachel and Hood. He’s going to use GPS to find Gretchen, Felix heads to the Dior show. Renny’s already there. With a bottle of Fervor.

Gretchen fights off the cab driver and escapes, running away—but first takes off her shoes. Smart move. Rachel follows while Renny sprays models with Fervor. Not good. The cops find the taxi, but no Gretchen. Or driver. They see Fervor, a shoe and blood. Not good. But they call in a canine unit as Gretchen runs away. What part of Manhattan are they in that’s so deserted at that time of night? Early morning, yes. Late night, no. Gretchen comes to a dead end and is stuck between an amorous cab driver and a chain fence. The cops come to the rescue and nab the driver while Sewell watches the Shelton sisters act again. Felix calls from Dior as the men start attacking the models.

Renny watches the commotion as Hood enters. Felix stops Renny, who admits he was disgruntled with his job. Then find a new one and quit, doofus. Don’t turn innocent people into killers. Hood uses the smoke jets attached to the runway to disperse the inhibitors into the show. It works and they calm down, dazed.

Now it’s Hood’s turn to walk the catwalk. Felix says he isn’t going to wear cologne for some time and Hood jokes with him. The two decide to walk to meet Rachel, who is 20 blocks away. Oh god, do you know how long 20 blocks is in Manhattan. Ouch. Gretchen is trying to call Rex, but figures it is a lost cause—being stood up isn’t good. Rachel leaves him a message saying Gretchen helped the FBI. Hopefully, Rex will call Gretchen back. Rachel puts Gretchen into the car of the NYPD as we fade to credits.

Quote of the Episode:

“You and that fine model had a connection? Are you on any medication?” –Felix

Looks like Eleventh Hour isn’t new next week. And I refrained from a RuPaul “Supermodel” reference. Go me!