Smash: Baring It All

Last week on “Smash”: Julia took Kyle under her wing to help him better shape “Hit List.” Which meant expanding the Diva’s role. Ivy celebrated her birthday with both Tom and then everyone else. He discovered this and was hurt, but Ivy explained they can’t be friends until after Bombshell opens. Jimmy and Karen continue to fool around but Karen tells Derek about them.

SMASH!


Tom is standing on an empty stage, looking out into an empty theater, as he calls for people. He tells the air that they have a show to do. And then Tom is in his birthday suit while everyone sits in the audience and laughs. Ivy even takes pictures using her phone.

But! It’s all a nightmare. Tom rolls over to see Ellis in bed with him. ELLIS. Okay, who said his name three times? WHO SAID HIS NAME THREE TIMES?? Quick, some start the exorcism.

Julia wakes Tom up. Oh, good it was just a nightmare within a nightmare scenario. Though they brought Jaime Ceparo back for that? There is only one way I’d tolerate Ellis back on my screen: If they went anywhere with Ellis stealing Julia’s book last season. Like a lawsuit in which Ellis tries to claim he created Bombshell and has the sheets as proof. Or something. But that’s assuming we get a third season and that’s looking pretty doubtful.

Anyway, Tom tells Julia about at least one dream, saying he was nervous for opening night. Julia reminds him that opening night is a few days away and he relaxes. Tonight is the invited dress rehearsal! Tom’s blood pressure is rising again.

Ivy wakes up with Derek. Aww. They talk but Ivy gives Derek the brush off. She seems happy to be just friends with benefits. He wants to be more. Ivy, though, chatters about the invited dress and insists who ever created it was evil. Derek just nods along.

Over in Brooklyn, Karen checks in with Jimmy. He’s been up for a few days, working on new songs for Ana now that her role’s been beefed up. Especially as he and Karen are afraid they’ll take songs away from Karen. She asks what he used to stay awake and Jimmy responds Red Bull. She makes sure he didn’t use anything harder, like the white powder she found in his jacket last week. But it seems he’s clean.

Time for the invited dress! Tom sits in the audience, ready to have a heart attack. Especially when the screen doesn’t open on cue for Ivy to start “Let Me Be Your Star.” And then the airplane doesn’t roll out in time for “Public Relations.” But his heart really stops at the end of “Our Little Secret.” JFK slips off Marilyn’s dress…and Ivy’s slip goes with it. Everyone gets to see her birthday suit…except for the home audience because, you know, FCC regulations and all. Tom’s eyes nearly pop out of his head while no doubt Linda is screaming at the lighting guy to override the cues to bring the lights down. Megan Hilty plays Ivy’s vulnerability and fear at everyone’s worst nightmare come to life well.

(Though anyone who is familiar with dream dictionaries probably know that being naked in one’s dreams have several different meanings. It is the reactions to being naked which belie the dreamer’s true feeling. In Tom’s case, his represents his fear of people finding flaws and being uncovered as a phony, in this case, as a phony director).

Let’s go to the New York Manhattan Theater Workshop. Derek loves the new music though Kyle isn’t convinced. Julia is there after some time at Bombshell (we’ll get to that in a minute) and Kyle does a spot-on Derek impersonation for her. Derek asks to talk to Julia and it’s nice when the show remembers they are friends. She tells him that she needed to separate the show from her feelings about Michael. And then she saw it through fresh eyes. She thinks Derek has to do the same thing and he realizes she’s right.

So he looks at the show in a whole new light. And he rips off is inspired by Sunset Blvd. He decides to make the ending the beginning and have the show told in flashback. The lighting guy (Blake?) cues up the final scene and Derek instructs Ana to sing “Broadway, Here I Come” a cappella as she walks through a crowd of concertgoers. Krysta Rodriguez can do some crazy eyes, I’ll tell you that. She raises her (prop) gun and fires as everything goes dark. The lights come back and everyone is impressed. Except Jimmy and Karen. Karen argues that “Broadway, Here I Come” is her favorite song so Derek shouldn’t give it away. Because that’s how songs are assigned. And end sarcasm. Derek pretty much tells Karen to grow up and Jimmy continues arguing. He turns to Kyle but Kyle says he likes the new staging.

Hearing the argument, Scott comes in to mediate. Jamey Sheridan is coming to preview Hit List and he doesn’t need everyone arguing. So they are forced to do it Derek’s new way, even though Karen keeps trying to argue that “Broadway, Here I Come” is her character’s anthem. Isn’t it sung by Amanda before she attempts to commit suicide? The song has suicidal overtones, after all. But Derek says she still sings it, Ana just has a pre-reprise. Karen is unhappy.

Over on Broadway, Ivy talks with Sam as they approach the theater. Namely, about Ivy’s little wardrobe mishap. She figures it will be a one night thing until Bobby says everyone is talking about it online. And ticket sales have gotten a boost due to it, according to Daphne Ruben-Vega. Eileen talks to Tom and Julia about keeping the nudity in the show. And then they go to talk to Ivy. She promises to think it over.

Meanwhile, Director!Tom has issues to work through and Eileen is considering cancelling that night’s performance so he can do so. But Tom asks her to wait, to give him time to fix everything. She relents and Tom gets to work.

Ivy has talked to Bernadette, who is all for her daughter going nude. Sam is still against it. He remind her he was in “Take Me Out” and asks her what it was about. Ivy thinks and says that all she remembers is “Penis.” Yeah, I could only remember it featured nudity. And baseball. Sam says that if you Google him, the first thing that pops up are pictures of Little Sam. Ivy should be remembered for her talent not her…talents (kudos to any Sailor Moon fans out there!).

Tom has managed to fix most of the problems…except the airplane. Which means intermission is still running longer than 15 minutes. But Tom lies and tells Eileen everything is perfect so the show will go on. Julia returns from Hit List with an idea. They implement it and the show goes on.

Downtown, Jamey arrives for the next showing of Hit List. Everyone waits backstage. Ana leans over to tell Karen that she didn’t want to steal any of her songs and are they cool? Karen is like, yeah, we’re cool. She tells Ana that Derek’s just mad at her and when he cools down, he’ll give her her songs back. Ana glares at Karen as if realizing how self-centered her friend can be. The show begins!

Uptown, we see what Julia suggested Tom do to cover the plane. “Public Relations” is no longer the top of the second act, I guess, but now it’s “Dig Deep.” The actors—and Ivy—pop up out of the audience to perform. Okay…Guess all the Playbills have to be reprinted. But there’s something more important: Will Ivy go nude? And the answer is: No. “Our Little Secret” ends with Ivy wearing her slip.

But wait! We get the aftermath, where JFK leaves Marilyn to return back to his family. Marilyn pleads with him to stay, but he says something all Legally Blonde fans picked up on: She’s not First Lady material. “I need a Jackie, not a Marilyn” anyone? Marilyn pleads with him and, at that point, Ivy drops the blanket to reveal she is nude. Everyone loves it.

Downtown, Derek tries to break up Karen and Jimmy. He casually flips through a magazine while he reveals that he loaned Jimmy a lot of money for him to pay off a debt. A drug debt. Karen decides Derek is just jealous and tries to blow him off. But he keeps at it. He points out that Scott has to pay Jimmy in cash because he doesn’t have a social security number. Karen continues to ignore him until Derek leaves.

At a bar, the “Bombshell” creatives gather to toast to a great preview. But Tom is obsessing over any little review online so he checks his phone. And finds Jamey Sheridan’s Times article. Everyone gathers around to read and Eileen gets angrier and angrier. Jamey compares Bombshell and Hit List, saying they discuss similar topics. But Bombshell is the past while Hit List is the future, he writes. Eileen is furious and ready to commit murder.

Meanwhile, Sam quits Bombshell because he’s tired of being a swing. Because that sounds like a good business decision. And end sarcasm.

They rejoice downtown, though Jimmy and Karen are still sulking. Everyone leaves and Ana notices Some Drug Dealer Guy lurking around. Run away, Ana! Nope, she goes and talks with him. He asks about Jimmy but Ana says he already left. Some Drug Dealer Guy is like “Oh, too bad. I wanted to talk to him.” Ana’s like “Wanna talk with me instead” and seriously, Ana, do you not recognize creepy people? He takes her up on her offer and they walk off. Oh, Ana.

So, I’m sure everyone knows by now that Smash has been cancelled. I’m going to miss it, but it was plagued by problems. But I’m going to be here until the orchestra stops playing the exit music. And judging by how far behind I am with my recaps, that might be until July.

Read the Playbill Smash report here.