OUAT: There is Suffering Too Terrible to Name

That’s right. I’m using Hamilton lyrics. And if you know Hamilton, you know those lyrics are from one of the most heart-breaking songs in the show.

You have been warned.

Last time on “Once:” Hades rescued Zelena from Rumple and Pan and they shared True Love’s Kiss. He took everyone’s names off the tombstones but Hook was still unable to leave the Underworld. Hades told them of a nectar Hook could eat and it would allow him to leave. Emma and Hook headed down to where the tree was while the others waited.

After convincing Robin to let Zelena take his daughter with Hades, he then stood with her and Henry as Henry wrote pages for the denizens of the Underworld. Cruella and the Blind Witch trapped them in the library and the heroes realized Hades was really behind it.

Further down, Emma weighed her heart but it appeared she and Hook did not share True Love. But when each chose the other over saving themselves, a door opened and their love was confirmed to be true. They discovered, though, that the ambrosia tree was cut down and realized Hades did it.

In the past, Emma met a bails bond person named Cleo, who tried to take Emma back to Phoenix. Emma discovered that there might be information about her and her parents so Cleo agreed to take her to the courthouse. Unsatisfied with what she found, Emma broke back in and Cleo had to come after her. They ended up running from the cops and Cleo was fatally wounded in the process. Emma ran off and changed her life, becoming a bails bond person. She also gave some closure to the daughter Cleo gave up for adoption.

As the portal to Storybrooke opened, Emma and Hook came to grips with the fact he could not return home. They had a bittersweet goodbye before Emma returned to help the others bust out of the library. They all made it into the portal as Rumple sent his father to the River o’ Souls, having returned Robin’s heart without Pan knowing.

Brace yourself. This is going to be painful.

And ranty.

OUAT: Weighing Your Heart

Last time on “Once:” Hades proposed to Zelena, offering to leave the heroes in the Underworld while the two of them took over Storybrooke. She didn’t say yes or no, but Regina was concerned. After talking to Zelena did nothing, she called in the big guns—Cora.

Hook helped Regina bust Cora out of her Underworld prison while David ran errands. Along the way, he ran into his twin brother James—who tased him and then pretended to be him. He went with Emma to drop supplies off for Robin Hood, taking Robin and Peanut with Cruella. They wanted to give Hades Peanut for a chance to be alive again.

Cora decided that they needed to give Zelena some water from one of the rivers of the Underworld that would make her forget about her feelings for Hades. So she went to the farmhouse and had a talk with her eldest while Regina waited for the moment to give her the water. But Zelena saw through it and the sisters fought again. Cora stopped them and revealed memories she had stolen from them years ago.

As a child, a lonely Regina used her mother’s wand in an attempt to turn her doll into a sister. She was knocked unconscious, forcing Cora to retrieve Zelena from Oz so she could heal Regina. Regina and Zelena bonded, becoming the best of friends. But when they realized they were sisters, Cora sent Zelena back to Oz and made both girls forget about their bond.

Their memories now restored, Regina and Zelena seemed to have a fresh start. Cora was able to go to the happy place and Regina agreed to let Zelena try to change Hades. Meanwhile, David and Hook came to Emma’s and Robin’s rescue. While Cruella got away, David ended up struggling with James and threw him into the harbor, trapping his twin in the River o’ Souls.

In the end, Regina agreed to let Zelena meet with Hades to try and change him. But Rumple and Peter Pan intercepted and kidnapped her instead.

Out on Main Street, most of the main cast argues about Regina’s choice to let Zelena go to Hades. Hook in particular thinks that the queen has gone mad. Regina insists they give Zelena a chance. They are then surprised and alarmed when Hades shows up. He tells them he is there for their help as Zelena never showed up for their date. Instead, he got a ransom note from Rumple and Peter Pan. While Regina looks ready to strangle the two, Emma asks why they should help Hades. He tells her if she does, he’ll take their names off the graves and let them go home.

(Hades looks as surprised as the heroes)

OUAT: Family Dynamics

Last time on “Once”: Red woke up and informed her friends that she came from Oz to find Zelena because she did something to Dorothy and Red wanted to know what it was. Hades warned Zelena about Red’s appearance and she tried to escape but Regina prevented her. Confronted, Zelena admitted to putting Dorothy under a sleeping curse and handed over her slippers so Red could get back. The only problem was finding someone to give Dorothy True Love’s Kiss.

It was decided to find Auntie Em, who ended up running a diner in the Underworld. She agreed to help but Hades trapped her in the River o’ Souls to prevent her from doing so. He then informed everyone that people who helped the heroes would also be thrown into the River o’ Souls. The heroines were not pleased.

Snow told Red that she should give Dorothy True Love’s Kiss because it was obvious to everyone that she loved Dorothy. So Red prepared to leave and take David with her so he could take care of Neal now that Cruella destroyed their one connection to him. But he got Hook to carve his name over Snow’s, allowing her to leave instead.

Back in Oz, Red and Mulan met Dorothy after Red accidentally scared off Toto. She and Dorothy didn’t get along but were forced to work together when Zelena kidnapped Toto. Red believed she scared Dorothy when she transformed into a wolf to take care of monkey but Dorothy ran off to confront Zelena. The witch used a sleeping curse on her, which Red ultimately broke with True Love’s Kiss as Mulan wondered what she was doing there.

Snow returned to Storybrooke and everyone else grew more resolute in their determination to get out of the Underworld.

A red car speeds along, Hades and Zelena inside of their way to a date. He takes her to a hill overlooking the Underworld’s version of Storybrooke and lays out a picnic for them. Hades asks her why she thought he brought here there and she says it’s her experience that men want one thing. He chuckles but tells her that he brought her up there to ask her something.

Hades reminds her that he made the Underworld to look like Storybrooke because he wanted to give her everything her sister had. But he knows it’s not the same. So if she restarts his heart, they can leave and take over Storybrooke for themselves. Zelena asks about the heroes and he reveals that after Snow’s switcheroo, he carved everyone’s name on the tombstones. So they’ll be trapped in the Underworld, leaving the two of them the freedom to cause chaos together.

Uh oh.

OUAT: Making Good

I’m running out of Wicked songs to use now! That title is a song that was cut and replaced with “The Wizard and I”! If we see anymore of Oz, I may have to start recycling titles. Or move on to “The Wiz.”

Last time on “Once”: Belle ran into her former fiancé, Gaston, in the Underworld. And he was out for Rumple’s head, spurned on by Hades. Belle, though, was trying to get Rumple to use his magic for good and decided to help Gaston with his unfinished business…which turned out to be her. He blamed her for making him weak and leaving him vulnerable to Rumple. When he tried to attack Rumple, Belle ended up pushing Gaston into the River o’Souls. Hades had made Belle a deal but voided it because she didn’t follow it to the letter. So her baby was still in danger.

After a failed attempt at breaking into Hades’ lair, Emma went to the cemetery with Hook and Snow because a dream told her to. But the dream also warned her of her mother dying and she worked hard to prevent that from happening. Especially because she felt guilty for getting everyone in this situation. After she was assured she had nothing to feel guilty for, Regina joined them to seek out the creature that had ended up pursuing them. It ended up being a wolf…who Snow lays a cape over it to turn it back into Red!

Why is she there? Is she dead? Let’s find out!

We open in Oz…some time ago. This scene was one of the sneak peeks posted by ABC during the week and it original said “Many years ago,” which had confused fans since Red and Mulan were in it. By their reckoning, it should be part of the current timeline. Adam confirmed on Twitter that they were right and that ABC had screwed up the graph. Looks like he got to someone in editing in time to correct it.

Red and Mulan walk down a deserted road as Red tries to sniff out her pack. Mulan asks her about this land and Red says there’s some singing, or at least there was in the movie. We know Storybrooke showed it since everyone was familiar with it back in Season 3B. Red also points out it was a book and all I could think of was “Samantha: An American Girl” where Rebecca Mader played Aunt Cornelia, who gave Samantha “The Wizard of Oz” as a gift.

(Welcome back, you two!)

OUAT: Nobody Seeks Revenge Like Gaston

Last time on “Once:” Rumple opened a portal for Hades to bring Peanut to the Underworld. It also brought Belle and a newly returned Zelena, who believed Hades wanted her daughter for the time travel spell she created back in Season 3. She pleaded with Belle to let her protect Peanut but Belle decided not to trust Zelena. So Zelena was forced to turn to Regina and Robin, who convinced Belle to give them Peanut. But they made the wrong decision to trust Zelena, who ran off with the baby.

Belle, meanwhile, learned she was pregnant…and that Rumple already gave it away centuries ago in a deal. She also learnt that he was the Dark One again and she ran off, unable to process everything.

In Oz, Hades sought out Zelena because he heard about her attempts to make a time travel spell. She tried to take the Scarecrow’s brain but a grown up Dorothy stopped her. Hades explained that he could lead Zelena to the Scarecrow and wanted to use her time travel spell to get revenge on Zeus, who stopped his heart until he received True Love’s Kiss. Which he figured was never going to happen. Feeling a connection with him, Zelena agreed to let him help. Together, they found the Scarecrow and Zelena took his brain. When she returned to her throne room, Hades revealed that he believed Zelena was his True Love and prepared to get a TLK from her. But she turned on him, thinking he wanted the time travel spell for himself. Hades went back to the Underworld and Zelena continued with her spell.

Afraid Hades wanted her daughter to enact the time travel spell, Zelena gave Peanut back to Robin for her own protection. Robin decided to go hide in the woods with her. Snow and Charming learned the message they sent their son made it and they grew more determined to get home.

Hades met with Zelena and assured her that he didn’t intend to hurt Peanut. He was trying to get her for Zelena because he still loved her. Zelena, though, wasn’t sure if he was playing her and so left him once again.

And now for tonight’s episode of “As the Underworld Turns”…

We open in the Enchanted Forest. Lord Maurice is back and trying to track down his daughter. Belle is in the stables and not even Regina’s riding coat can hide the fact Emilie de Ravin is heavily pregnant. But we’ll ignore that for now.

OUAT: Wonderful

Last time on “Once:” Emma met Liam, Hook’s deceased older brother. He didn’t think she was good enough for Hook, which bothered her. Hook, meanwhile, believed Liam didn’t belong in the Underworld and together they were going to figure out how to defeat Hades. Henry had met the Apprentice and figured there was a storybook in the Sorcerer’s mansion. Meanwhile, Liam asked Emma to let Hook move on as Hook wondered if he was worth saving.

As they searched for the book, Hades paid Liam a visit and asked him to remove the pages pertaining to the god. He threatened to reveal the reason why Liam was in the Underworld to Killian and it worked. Liam removed the pages but Emma suspected him. When she told Hook of her suspicions, though, he took Liam’s side and stormed off.

In the past, Liam went to enlist so he could save himself and Killian from their time on Captain Silver’s ship. But when Silver got Killian drunk and tricked him into gambling away his money, Liam’s dreams of serving in the navy were dashed. They continued to sail with Silver until he took the crew on a suicidal mission to retrieve the Eye of the Storm. Liam and Killian led a mutiny and succeeded. But Hades made a deal with Liam and he lied, keeping them on their suicidal mission. In the end, only Liam and Killian made it out alive…but with the jewel. They were rescued by the royal navy of…wherever…and were given commissions on the spot.

Killian learned the truth as Silver and his crew took Liam. Hades taunted the Brothers Jones and Liam almost fell to his death. But when he sacrificed himself for Killian, he earned his place in the Happy Place. It also worked for the sailors he sacrificed, so after a goodbye to Killian—who decided to stay—they headed off to Happy Place.

Hook went back with Emma, determined to learn Hades’ secret and go home with Emma. Meanwhile, we learnt that the pages Liam ripped out featured Hades with Zelena!

dun dun DUN!

OUAT: Brotherly Love

Last time on “Once:” Rumpelstiltskin recruited his ex-wife and Hook’s former lover, Milah, to help him and Emma rescue Hook. It worked but Hades made a deal with Rumpelstiltskin, who ended up killing Milah again and lying about it. Typical Rumple.

Regina went searching for Daniel’s grave and found that he moved on. She also had some closure with her horse.

In the past, Bae suffered a snakebite that was poisonous. But the antidote was too expensive for his parents. Milah convinced Rumple to kill the healer and steal it. While she was flirting with Hook, he tried to do so but instead made a deal with the healer for it. He agreed to give the healer his second born child, much to Milah’s horror. Rumple failed to see the problem.

Until he thought about having children with Cora. He killed the healer but it seemed the deal didn’t die, especially in the Underworld. Hades had the contract Rumple signed and he revealed that Belle was pregnant. And Rumple was going to do what he wanted or Hades would take his child.

Uh oh.

Henry needs an adult. He’s in Cruella’s car as she speeds through the woods in the Underworld. She’s certain they can find someone who can lead them to the pen there and stops, letting Henry so they can search. 

(This is a dangerous situation)

OUAT: In Which Rumple is a Colossal Jerk

Last time on “Once:” Hook tried to outrun Cerberus and failed, but managed to get Megara out. She got his message to Emma and the others but now the Cerberus was after them. Mary Margaret realized an old friend of hers was in the Underworld and she asked him for help, figuring he could help them find Hook while getting a chance to move on. This friend? Hercules!

We learned that Hercules befriended a young Snow when she was struggling with how to be a ruler. He taught her archery and how to stand up to bandits being paid by Regina to terrorize the countryside. In the end, the people loved Snow White and she kissed Hercules before he continued with his tasks to join Mt. Olympus.

(No one tell David)

Robin and Henry broke into Cora’s office to try and get some maps. Robin stood guard while Henry crawled through the air duct, coming across Cruella. She told him that his pen is down in the Underworld and he could use it to help the souls finish their business and move on. Henry left the office, keeping his encounter with the psychopath a secret.

Regina gave Mary Margaret a pep talk, which led to Mary Margaret giving Hercules a pep talk. As the Cerberus attacked again, she teamed up with Hercules and Megara to finally defeat it. Hercules and Meg clicked and went off to Mt. Olympus together. Mary Margaret decided to be Snow White full time again.

Hades ordered Hook to pick three of his friends to stay in the Underworld to replace the souls they had helped escape.

We open there, with Hades waiting for Hook to chisel names into the tombstones. But Hook drops it and says he won’t do that. So Hades hauls him over to the green river filled with souls we all remember from he movie. He warns Hook not to touch it or his soul will be trapped there forever and says they’re going for a little boat ride.

(That's definitely not It's a Small World)

OUAT: Go the Distance

Last time on “Once:” It was Once’s 100th episode! Most of the leads arrived in the Underworld, searching for Hook. Regina ended up reuniting with her mother, who warned her to leave the Underworld or something terrible would happen to her father. Gold reunited with his father and got the Draught of Sinead so Emma could talk to Emma. It didn’t work but she glimpsed a battered and bloody Hook. Regina also used the draught to talk to her father, who told her to stay and help her friends. He forgave her for killing him, giving Regina some closure.

In the Enchanted Forest, Regina celebrated her birthday by almost killing Snow White. Henry Sr. tried to convince her to let the vengeance plot go but she refused. He contacted Cora, who came and took Snow’s heart as a present for her daughter. But Henry ended up switching the hearts, so Snow got to live. Regina punished him by putting him in a box before banishing her mother once again. But Cora took the box with Henry in it from Regina before she returned to Wonderland.

With Regina remaining in the Underworld, she had to stop her mother from hurting Henry, Sr. Regina and Henry stood up to Cora and the fire receded, letting him cross over into a better place. He first got to meet his grandson and say goodbye to his daughter before leaving the Underworld.

Henry dubbed their quest Operation Firebird and the heroes continued their quest to save Hook.
We open with Hook. He’s still bloody and battered, awaking in some sort of prison. Hook decides to try to leave but a scared young woman warns him not to. She says they all end up back in the cells and that they can’t escape. Hook tells her that someone is there for him and he’s going to find her. He takes the young woman, insisting they will escape together.

Hook and the woman start running as they hear growls behind them. It soon becomes clear that they won’t be able to outrun whatever is pursuing them. But Hook can give the woman a chance to get out. He tells her to find Emma Swan and tell her that she knows where Killian Jones—Captain Hook—is. The woman nods and Hook takes a stand as Cerberus, the three-headed hellhound, emerges from the shadows.

(Creepy)

OUAT: Hellbound

Last time on “Once:” The Ringwraith Convention haunted Storybrooke as our heroes tried to find Captain Hook. They learned that he intended to send them to the Underworld, allowing the Ringwraith Convention to come back to life as Dark Ones. Regina tried to reason with him while Emma prepared to sacrifice herself to save everyone.

Meanwhile, Zelena was going to use the fact everyone was about to go to hell as a way to get sole custody of Peanut. Robin and Regina worked together and Regina banished Zelena back to Oz.

In the flashbacks, the Evil Queen tested Hook by insisting that he kill the father who abandoned him as a child. Hook and Papa Jones had a heart-to-heart where Papa Jones insisted he’s changed. So Hook decided to fake Papa Jones’ death, and to squirrel him and the son Papa Jones now has out of the country. But when Hook learned that his new brother shares the same name as his late brother, he saw red and killed Papa Jones.

Back in Storybrooke, the heroes prepared to go to hell. Gold sent Belle on a world adventure, the Charmings had one more family dinner and Outlaw Queen actually made provisions for their children. Emma tried to talk sense into Hook and he it worked. He took in all the darkness and asked Emma to kill him with Excalibur. She did so, freeing herself from being the Dark One.

When Emma discovered that Gold was the Dark One again, she blackmailed him into taking her to the Underworld so she could rescue Hook. Everyone else decided to come along for the ride because their names are in the credits.

Which brings us to now…