SMASH!
We start with…someone misspelling Anjelica Huston’s name as “Angelica.” Way to go, show! Anyway, the cast sings “Under Pressure” as they walk around New York City to get to the Marquis Theater which is hosting the Fake Version of the 67th Annual Tony Awards.
And I’m going to sidetrack for a bit of a rant. During this time, everyone is in winter coats, scarves, gloves, etc. For those unaware, the Tony Awards are generally the second Sunday of June. The Real Version of the 67th Annual Tony Awards took place on June 9th. So it is usually warm out. I know the episode was filmed in late February/early March, so it was still cold out then. Which means the wardrobe department dressed them for the actual weather, not the weather it would be for the episode’s setting. And that just makes everything feel so weird. Why would everyone be wearing winter coats in June?
Anyway, the cast gathers on the empty stage of the Marquis Theater to finish the song. In case you missed all the Rent allusions, they even finish lined up across the stage before walking away. Only Tom remains because it’s Tom’s dream sequence! He wakes up and it’s the day before the Tonys. Everyone is in tizzy!
We start with the fallout from Derek’s confession. Jerry has decided to stand behind Daisy and gotten newspapers to print articles about how she went from victim to victor. Though I wouldn’t peg her as a victim. I still think she may be the sexual harasser, not Derek. Yes, Derek promised her a job in exchange for sex. But Daisy is the one who kept holding it over his head.
Anyway, Jerry supports Daisy despite the fact everyone else hates her. To the point where he decides that the Tony performance should include Daisy, so they are performing “I’m Not Sorry” instead of the original choice of “Rewrite This Story.” Especially since Jimmy is MIA and Derek won’t come out of his apartment. The show has what is poised in the Smash universe to be the one of the great Broadway anthems in the vein of “No Business Like Show Business” and “Lullaby of Broadway” with “Broadway, Here I Come” and it’s not even considered? Seriously?
Karen is so desperate and frustrated, she turns to Ivy for help. Shocking, I know. And Ivy does help. She tells Karen to have the cast revolt against Daisy. Certainly Jerry will have to listen to them then. Karen asks her to talk to Derek. Because Karen already tried but failed. She admits that Ivy has a special connection with Derek. Maybe she can get through.
Ivy does go and talk to Derek. And she’s horrified by what she sees. Garbage everywhere and lots of empty beer bottles. Derek’s scruffier than usual and it appears he hasn’t showered in days. Ivy gives him a pep talk and tells him to show up at the Tonys. He’s not keen on the idea, given that he’s a pariah in the theater community. But she tells him to triumph over that. And then leaves.
She gets ready for the Tonys with her mother. Which means they are watching one of Leigh’s old acceptance speeches as they try on their dresses. Theater lovers note that the speech is actually Bernadette Peters’ from when she won for “Annie Get Your Gun.” So does that mean Leigh Conroy did everything Bernadette Peters did? The original Witch in “Into the Woods”? Original Dot in “Sunday in the Park with George”?
Anyway, Leigh notices that Ivy’s dress doesn’t fit anymore. So what does Leigh do? Shame her daughter for gaining weight. Oh, Leigh. Ivy decides to test the waters about telling Leigh she’s about to become a grandmother by making a remark about possibly taking some time off should she win a Tony. Leigh is completely against it. She says Ivy needs to keep the momentum moving and regrets that it took a while for her to get back into the swing of things after having Ivy. In her mind, Ivy makes a list of things not to do or say when she becomes a mother.
Jimmy continues to make me worried that his storyline might end in murder-suicide when it appears he’s putting his affairs in order. He cleans out the apartment he shared with Kyle and gives the keys back to the landlord. Then he goes to Tom’s apartment, where Julia is writing a song with Tom for the Tony telecast. Good old Smash, still pretending such a number would be written the day of the telecast. Jimmy asks Julia to accept Kyle’s award should he win at the Tonys. But Julia thinks Jimmy ought to do that.
And that convinces him! He goes over to Karen and Ana’s to pick up Karen. Ana is depressed because she can’t go. But Jimmy offers her Kyle’s ticket and she goes to grab a dress. Uh, Smash, you do realize that the League gives out two tickets to each nominee? So Karen could’ve brought Ana the entire time. And wouldn’t Kyle’s parents want to go to the Tonys? Anybody?
Bueller?
But guess who does get to take a guest to the Tonys. Eileen! Because she’s Anjelica Huston. Or as this episode credited her, Angelica Huston. Eileen finds Thorsten Kaye working at a grease trap in Manhattan. She holds up a suit and tells him he is going to the Tony Awards. He’s not sure why she continues to seek him out. Because you’re Thorsten Kaye, dude! Susan Haskell is a lucky woman. (And Thorsten Kaye is a lucky man). Anyway, Thorsten agrees to go. Yay!
Meanwhile, Julia is still dealing with Frank. Her lawyer had her write out everything that happened with Michael Swift and give it to Frank…so that he has ammunition? Eileen, this is your best lawyer? Frank is less than pleased but they eventually decide just to settle things between them and be free of the fighting. Yay!
Please to note: This is Brian d’Arcy James’ last appearance in Smash. We still didn’t get to hear him sing a full song.
And so we go to the Tony Awards! Which is on a really tight budget in this universe. The stage is bare and there appears to be no host. Just a series of presenters standing at a podium borrowed from the local high school. Anyway, we first see the award for Best Performance by a Featured Actress in a Musical. Will it be Daisy, Ivy or Lynn? It’s Daisy! Everyone tries to look happy for her.
Next is Best Book of a Musical! Julia tells Tom that she’d be okay if she didn’t win. Tom is surprised and impressed. And guess what? Julia doesn’t win. Kyle does. Really? I thought his book sucked? Or we forgetting that? I guess we’re forgetting that. Jimmy goes up to give a speech for Kyle. He talks about Kyle’s love for Broadway, how Kyle met Karen and how Kyle got to live his dream. It’s actually sweet.
But Julia isn’t disappointed for long! While she’s going on about how Kyle deserved the award, she and Tom totally miss the fact they’ve just won their first Tony! Until there are cameras in their faces and a bright light shining on them. They hug and run up to collect their award. And they give Merritt Weaver a run for her money in the “shortest acceptance speech ever” category with just “Thank you!” They then rush off the stage.
So let’s award best choreographer. The cast of Bombshell hangs out in the wings, hoping Derek wins for their show rather than Hit List. Why are they in the wings? Because Bombshell’s performance is on after this award. And they’re doing “Let’s Be Bad”! Spoiler alert: We won’t see it. Anyway, who wins? It’s Derek! And what does he win for? Hit List. Bobby says that it was their last chance to hope for a Best Musical win. But everyone is more focused on whether Derek is going to show up or not. Guess what? He does! Everyone is shocked and no one really claps. But he gets up there, thanks people and then PROFESSES HIS LOVE FOR IVY! It’s amazing.
But not enough to make up for the fact we didn’t get to see “Let’s Be Bad” one more time, show.
Guess what we do get to see? Hit List’s number! Derek goes backstage and takes the harness off Daisy. You see, when the cast rebelled Jerry decided to just put Daisy out on the Tony telecast, singing “Reach for Me.” Look, I get supporting the “victim” (still think she’s turned into the harrasser by holding their sex over Derek to get what she wants) but I think Jerry’s gone too far. Giving her the Tony performance rather than people who actually worked with the sainted Kyle Bishop?
Derek remedies this and in some way, takes Daisy’s power over him away by denying her the chance to perform on live TV. Instead, Karen starts singing “Broadway, Here I Come” a cappella. Jimmy, Sam and Ana join her and they use only their hands and feet to provide accompaniment. When I first heard it on iTunes, I didn’t like it. But after watching the performance, I warmed up to it. And I’m sure the imaginary producers, while confused, were excited in the imaginary control room.
Still would’ve preferred “Let’s Be Bad.”
No, I’m not bitter. Why?
Anyway, time to award Best Actress in a Musical! Marin Mazzie is handing out the award. I’ve seen her twice but am hesitant to add her to my list. She is playing herself, after all. But Marin has an amazing voice. And she’s an amazing actress. So, who wins? Karen or Ivy? And it is…Ivy. I’ll admit, reader, I squeed. And clapped. Ivy goes up to accept her award, all teary-eyed. And she delivers an awesome acceptance speech. Watch it here:
Isn’t it great? I’ll admit I got a little worried there for a minute. I thought Ivy was going to work in a thank you for Karen for dropping out or something but there was nothing. Thank goodness.
Karen’s disappointed she didn’t win but hey, maybe Hit List will still take the big prize. Rosie O’Donnell comes out to announce the award. Who will take it? Bombshell? Hit List? It’s…Bombshell! Of course! It had to be Bombshell. Smash was centered around it, the entire series was about Bombshell even when Hit List came into being. If Bombshell didn’t win, it would be a let down to the fans, I think. Unless you were a Hit List fan. Then two things: 1. Sorry about the loss and 2. Can you tell me what it was about? I still haven’t a clue.
So the Bombshell people crowd the stage. And by crowd, I mean about six or seven of them get up there. Eileen and Thorsten Kaye and Ivy and Tom and Julia and Bernadette Peters. Everyone but Thorsten Kaye and Bernadette Peters have Tony Awards. So Bernadette holds up her golden clutch as if it were an award. It’s great.
And so the fake 67th Tony Awards are over. But the final episode isn’t over yet!
Because you know who’s still around? That guy Tom pissed off in the previous hour. He approaches Julia and Tom about making a movie together. A musical, of course! And Julia and Tom are the perfect people for the job! Of course!
For those who don’t know, this was to set up the third season should Smash get one. It was going to center around a movie musical written by Julia and Tom, directed by Derek and starring Karen. In fact, there was a cut scene where an agent comes up to comfort Karen about losing the Tony. She supposedly tells Karen that she’s meant to be a star and not for the stage. I’m not sure what the plan was for Ivy, unless they were going to write her out as staying home with the baby. Though I don’t know if they’d continue on along with the Derek/Karen flirtation for reasons we’ll get into later.
But back to Tom and the Director. Tom kisses the Director, who pushes him away. He insists he’s not gay but Tom’s not buying it. He thinks the Director is in the closet. Ladies and gentlemen, Tom’s Season 3 love interest! Too bad we’ll never know if he was the love of Tom’s life.
Let’s check in with Jimmy and Karen. He has something important to tell her. Turns out he wasn’t getting his affairs in order to commit suicide but to report to jail. Remember how he admitted to leaving a girl to OD and maybe die by herself? Well, Kyle’s death forced him to want to be a better person and so he went down to the police and turned himself in. Turns out the girl did not die but he still has to serve time for drug dealing. He’s made a deal to serve between six and eighteen months. With the show hinting he’d only serve the minimum—you know, so he’d be out in time if Season 3 got the green light! I imagine he was able to get such a good sentence because he turned in his brother, Some Guy. Anyway, he asks Karen to wait and she says she will. How sweet. (Hence why I thought there would be a damper on the Karen/Derek flirting in a possible Season 3).
You know what we don’t get to hear? Ivy telling Derek he’s going to be a daddy. Instead, we see him tenderly holding her still flat stomach as she cuddles up to him at the after party. Aww.
So, we’re nearing the end of Smash. How does the series go out? With a song! How else would it go out? Julia and Tom run over the bartender, who was kind enough to tape the finale since they were off in the press room following Bombshell’s win. And they did write the song, after all.
Ivy and Karen take the stage to sing “Big Finish” rather than the usual “roll the credits as the Best Musical team hug and cry on stage.” As they sing, Jimmy surrenders himself to the police. Or is about to. The last sight of Jimmy in Smash is him kissing Karen outside the station. We also see Julia knock on someone’s door. It’s Will Chase! Sorry, I mean Michael Swift. How nice of them to bring him back for a few seconds after unceremoniously dumping him after the first season!
(Actually, I read that Josh Safran planned for Michael Swift to come back for Season 3. That he’d have an arc which would rehab his character. Hence his inclusion here).
So as “Big Finish”…well, finishes…so does Smash. And therefore, this recap. And before the New Year! Please allow me to pat my back.
What’s Smash’s final conclusion? It will probably go down in the books of television history as one which failed to live up to its promise. And that it had a (mostly) great cast. We may nitpick over who in the cast was the weak link but we can agree the writing sometimes failed them. But for the time, it was a wild ride.
So long, Smash. We’ll miss you and everything you could’ve been.
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