Merry Christmas to all and in the Morning, I'm Getting a Cat-Scan!

The last movie dealt with one scenario of Santa's beginnings. This one proposes a different theory: Put on the red suit, you become Santa Claus.

Yes, The Santa Clause. It tells the story of Scott Calvin (Tim Allen) an executive who isn't the Christmasy or fatherly type. One Christmas Eve, he and his son Charlie (Eric Lloyd), disturb Santa Claus right off the roof. Scott puts on the suit, Charlie finds the sleigh and the next thing he knows, he reluctantly gives out all the presents. The reindeer take him to the North Pole where he meets elves Bernard (David Krumholtz) and Judy (Paige Tamada) who try to guide Scott to be Santa. However, he's convinced it's a dream but Charlie knows it is real. As Scott goes through the transformation from Tim Allen to Santa Claus, his ex-wife (Wendy Crewson) and her new husband (Judge Reinhold) grew more worried about his relationship with Charlie. As Scott embraces his inner-Santa, the police start a manhunt for him and Charlie.

This is one of Allen's best, allowing him to show a range from his typical comedic shtick to dramatic moments. Lloyd also held his own despite his age and Reinhold plays well off of Allen. Krumholtz is also a delight as an elf.

The script has very light moments that serve the holiday spirit well. It can also easily be the best of the three Santa Clause movies. For that, I give it four and a half candy canes out of five.

Let It Be Known Across the Land From Sea to Sea...

Let's face it. Come December, the most popular guy on the planet is Santa Claus (no matter what you call him--St. Nick, Kris Kringle, Father Christmas, Pere Noel, etc). And there are many movies out there that star the jolly merrymaker facing many different scenarios. Yet, what are Santa's origins?

Santa Claus is Comin' to Town seeks to answer that question. It tells the young story of Kris Kringle, the adopted son of a family of toymakers. He grows up learning how to make toys, be generous and little tricks that he would later apply to his trade. Upon reaching adulthood, he decides to go hand out his family's toys in a nearby town. Unfortunately, the Burgermeister--the ruler--has just declared toys illegal after suffering an injury. Kris has to sneak in the toys with the help of local schoolteacher Jessica, the Winter Warlock, and a penguin named Topper. In time, Kris adopts the name Santa Claus and limits his visits to Christmas Eve, but is still the generous soul he ever was.

Narrated by Fred Astaire, the store is told in the claymation style that was popular in TV's early days. Like Rudolph and Mr. Magoo's Christmas Carol, the songs in this special are particularly memorable as well. There is the title song that everyone knows by heart crooned masterfully by Astaire. My family's favorite is "No More Toymakers to the King!"--regarding the Burgermeister Meisterburger's decision to outlaw toys. And I know I've hummed to myself "One Foot in Front of the Other" in difficult or nerve-wracking times.

Another thing I love about this special is how strong-willed and independent Jessica is in it. She stands up for the children, helps Kris bring joy and finds a way to break him and his friends out of prison. In some ways, she is his greatest ally and it is no surprise that she becomes Mrs. Claus. One most hope the women who have played (or will play) Santa's wife take a few lessons from Jessica. She is how I imagine Mrs. Claus to be--Santa's equal partner.

For Jessica Claus and a rallying anthem, I award Santa Claus is Comin' to Town five candy canes out of five.

And I leave you with one quote: "A yo-yo? I love yo-yos!"
"Sire, you are breaking your own law!"

Never underestimate the power of a yo-yo.

Misfits ROCK!

"Why am I such a misfit? Why am I such a misfit? Just because my nose glows..."

Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer is the longest running Christmas special, debuting a year before the classic Merry Christmas, Charlie Brown! We've all sung the song, but a refresher. Rudolph is born with a glowing red nose. His parents, Donner and his wife, cover up the nose but it's discovered. Rudolph is ridiculed by everyone. Meanwhile, elf Herbie is having trouble fitting in with the other elves. You see, Herbie doesn't want to make toys. Herbie wants to be a dentist! He is ridiculed by the other elves. He and Rudolph decide to run away, where they go on many adventures--befriending Yukon Cornelius, running from the Abdominal Snowman and visiting the Island of Misfit Toys. Eventually, they return to the North Pole to save Christmas.

The movie comes with humor, poignancy, yet a moral lesson at heart: Treat everyone with respect. No one's dreams should be crushed, mocked. And I must say, recently rewatching this classic, I was disturbed with how cruel everyone really was. Young reindeer? Okay, we've all made fun of that funny kid (and have been that funny kid). Head Elf/Taskmaster? Yes, we've all had this type of boss/teacher. But SANTA CLAUS? The man who determines who is naughty and who is nice? The most generous man on earth? He is downright mean to Rudolph throughout most of the movie, viewing the nose as some sort of disability that prevents Rudolph from having a normal life. Fortunately, he comes around and admits he was wrong. I guess even Santa needs to learn a lesson or two.

And why was that doll on the Island of Misfit Toys in the first place? She seemed perfectly normal to my father and I.

The special comes with some great songs, most sung by the legendary Burl Ives. Multiple viewings of Rudolph are the reason why I was listening to a music clip and was able to identify Ives immediately as the singer despite never hearing the song before. "Silver and Gold" has to be one of my favorite songs of the movie.

For a strong moral message, for being a classic, I am awarding Rudolph four candy canes out of five. It loses one because of my newfound awareness of how cruel everyone is in this special.

Talk About Issues, Oy.

"Fred Claus" isn't your usual Santa Claus movie. In fact, it's a movie about family dysfunction masquerading as a Santa movie.

Fred (Vince Vaughn) is the older brother of jolly old St. Nicholas himself (Paul Giamatti). The movie details exactly why Fred becomes estranged from his brother--Nicholas was clearly the darling of their mother's (Kathy Bates) eye. (Papa Claus--Treavor Peacock--just stands there throughout the whole movie and is a waste of space). So years later, Fred is living in Chicago. He loses his girlfriend Wanda (Rachel Weisz) and ends up in jail in one day and, while pleading with his brother for bail money, ends up agreeing to work at the North Pole for money to open a new business. Fred goes up to the North Pole, much to Annette Claus' (Miranda Richardson) dismay. He befriends Willy (John Michael Higgins) and Charlene (Elizabeth Banks) and shakes things up at the North Pole. For some reason, Santa appears to be part of a larger corporation who has sent Clyde (Kevin Spacey) to evaluate the North Pole's efficiency. If Santa fails, Christmas is cancelled. With Fred's misadventures and some underhanded prodding by Clyde, it takes a miracle to save the holiday.

The movie takes care to show why Fred is slightly justified in his feelings toward his family. In fact, if he had written to Dear Abby, I'm sure she would've told him to cut ties with them. And in an intervention scene, there is a moment where you watch them fight and think, "And they think Fred has the problems?" Wanda hits his problem though on the head but the family ignores it--he is afraid to let people love him because he doesn't have the self-esteem to. Santa in this movie is depicted as not knowing that you can do the wrong thing for the right reason (like chopping down his brother's favorite tree to be the family Christmas tree) or that someone is rarely naughty for the sake of being naughty. This was an interesting angle to take.

The movie is clearly supposed to be about Fred and Nick's reconnecting as brothers. I feel it fell far from this point. There are a few moments of brotherly interactions between the two, but Fred had a stronger relationship with Willie than his own brother. He comes back to help his brother out on Christmas Eve, but the feeling that they are reconciled is never achieved between Santa and Fred. This feeling is better between Annette and Fred as well as Wanda and Fred, but not so much where it matters. There is never really a scene showing them not fighting and just being two brothers until the very end, when Fred needs to save the day.

Vaughn does a good job balancing the comedy and dramatic as Fred Claus. He plays the goof-off with a heart of gold well, so this was up his alley. Giamatti was also a good choice as Santa, slightly neurotic yet still the kindly person we all imagine. Bates was spot-on as the overbearing and disapproving mama. Both Weisz and Richardson were severally underused in their roles, Richardson making the best of what she was given in every scene she was in. Spacey stole the movie as Clyde as did Higgins as Willie. Banks was good though she deserved some more costume than something ordered out of Victoria's Secret.

The movie has some cute scenes, particularly when Fred dons the famous red suit. Keep your eyes peeled at the Siblings Anonymous meeting--some famous faces related to even more famous faces play themselves.

So, for being almost cute and not great, for causing me to want to slap everyone in the movie, for underusing Miranda Richardson, for not clearing up certain things (like my sister yelled throughout the course of the movie: "WHY ARE THEY ALL STILL ALIVE?"), I give "Fred Claus" three candy canes out of five.